


A World of Our Own

by fireroasted



Category: Runaways (Comics), Runaways (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Notting Hill, F/F, Fluff, Idiot Soulmates, Romance, supportive friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24319330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireroasted/pseuds/fireroasted
Summary: Nico has spent years fighting for her independence, and now that she has found her peace, she is determined to hold onto it. She’s happy with her life, her friends, and her little bookstore. Until a beautiful blonde stranger comes in for refuge and takes more than just a change of clothes.This story is based on a little movie called Notting Hill.
Relationships: Chase Stein/Gertrude Yorkes, Karolina Dean/Nico Minoru
Comments: 9
Kudos: 182





	1. Chapter 1

“Sorry, I’m late,” a young woman in a red coat said as she approached the table. “The traffic was insane.”

A dark-haired woman at the table looked up from her phone with a big smile. “Hey, no worries. I hear they’re filming the next new Helix movie a couple blocks down. Got you your usual, by the way.” 

“Ugh, you’re a lifesaver. And you’re totally right—it was at the old library, I think. I didn’t know what they were filming but it was seriously holding up traffic. Like way more than usual.”

“People would do anything to catch a glimpse of Jake Gyllenhal,” the dark-haired woman chuckled into the wide ceramic rim of her mug. “Did you watch the first Helix?”

“Oh, god yes. Forget Jake,” the woman in red said, waving her hands emphatically, “have you seen Charlize Theron? That suit? Jesus Christ. And Karolina Dean? That new outfit is everything.” 

“Is it bad that I want to get the new poster for my bedroom like a horny teenager?”   
  
The woman in red erupted into laughter. “The one with Karolina Dean looking like she’s ready to tear your heart out and you’re going to like it? Yeah, I get it.” 

“Thank you! I think I’m going to ask Charlie to get it for me for Christmas. You know, I was talking to Rachel earlier today, and she said she doesn’t see Karolina Dean’s appeal. Like, you’d have to be blind.”

“Oh my god, you’re kidding! Wait, how is Rachel? I heard she just got engaged. That’s probably why—love changes you.”

Nico turned away from the two loud women beside her as they burst into another round of laughter and took a sip of her coffee. She let the bitterness play on her tongue for a moment, then briefly wondered why anybody would distract themselves from the complexities of coffee with milk and sugar. She looked out the window and watched the other early birds mill around the Sunday market stalls on the street outside. Then again, she mused, people distract themselves from the flavour profiles of life all the time by filling it up with drivel. Like gossip and celebrity crushes—stories of people they don’t know and will never meet. It’s strange. 

Well, maybe Nico wasn’t so different. 

She liked simple. Appreciated the distractions sometimes. She preferred her easy, predictable peace while the world outside her own blazed on. Nothing mattered more than solemn moments with herself or meaningful interactions with her friends. She preferred the comfort and familiarity of this little neighbourhood in this increasingly less sleepy part of town, rooting her here and giving her strength. She found beauty in ignoring the complexities of life, and never wanted to lose this piece of paradise. 

She soon drained the last of her coffee and replaced her empty mug on the saucer to join the meanderers floating around the market, saving her energy only for the familiar faces she’d grown accustomed to in her last three years here. The boys at the flower shop waved. She waved back. 

The girl at the artisanal peanut butter tent offered samples on a cracker. Despite the girl’s insistence, she politely refused, explaining that she didn’t need any peanut butter at the moment and felt it rude to take advantage of the girl’s kindness. The girl always insisted, smiling in a way that lit up her whole face, but Nico almost always walked away empty-handed. 

The girl at the soap and honey stall winked and she inwardly rolled her eyes every time. The boy at the fruit stall shared a minimum requirement of small talk while she perused the selection. Here too, she almost always walked away empty-handed, but she enjoyed the routine nevertheless. 

It was easy. Predictable. Just how she liked it. 

Little could Nico have suspected how much everything was about to change. 

For now, she continued her leisurely stroll, a bag of Skittles open in her hand, toward the blue door of her bookstore below her apartment. She smiled as she approached—her bookstore; her apartment. Even after a year, she still loved the way those words sounded. Even if both those things may not be hers for much longer. She popped a couple skittles into her mouth and tried not to think about it. 

The door clacked open and closed without the wind chimes and doorbells her neighbours were so fond of. They were unnecessary complications that would disrupt her peace—no, the squeaky hinge and the scrape of the lock’s metal against wood was enough.

“Hey, boss, welcome back!” 

Nico looked up from the empty Skittles packet in her hands. “Oh, hey, Mol. What’s new?”

Molly raised her arms enthusiastically as she always did when she greeted her. Her permanently toothy grin never failed to make Nico smile. “Not much since I came in fifteen minutes ago. On time,” Molly said, flexing her arm with pride. “Oh! A new shipment came in, and—wait, are you eating candy for breakfast? Again?” 

Behind an old, chipped silver antique cash register, Nico edged onto her favourite high chair. “No, I had coffee. Obviously,” she replied with a raise of her brow. “And now I’m going to have one of the those weird chocolate banana Kit Kats that my dad sent me, so—potassium and all that.” 

Molly groaned when Nico reached into her drawer and triumphantly pulled out a large, visibly well-loved purple bag where she kept her infamous candy stash. “Oh my god, Nico! I can’t believe you used to be my hero. I mean, in a way, I still admire you because all you seem to do is eat candy and drink coffee and you never seem to gain a single pound, but—no! I’m not going to let oppressive beauty standards fool me into thinking you’re a healthy human being in any way!” 

Nico shrugged as she tore open one of many individually wrapped chocolate bars from the bag. “One thing Gert never allowed you to learn”—she grinned—“sometimes ignorance is bliss.” 

Molly glared. “I’m going out to get some real breakfast. For both of us. Alright?” 

Nico waved her off. “I can’t afford to pay you anyway, so do whatever you want.” Once the door swung closed, Nico leaned back on her stool with a sigh and took a big bite of her chocolate wafer. Not like anyone ever comes in here anyway, she thought. 

She looked around the little store, with its warm wooden shelves, matching floors, and faded brick walls. It wasn’t much to look at, but it was hers. Her own little world within a world she was tired of trying to understand. Didn’t want to understand anymore. 

Her eyes caught the angry, red numbers on the spreadsheets she’d left here the night before. Her fault, she supposed, for opening an occult book store between a natural baby goods store and a flower shop. It was out of place, and passion didn’t quite pay the bills. Nor did sheer will and prayer. 

A few minutes later, she was just about to start unpacking the freshly delivered box of books in her office when she heard the door open. She put her utility knife down and furrowed her brow. “Molly?” She whispered to herself. That can’t be right. Unless she forgot her wallet. Unless it’s…

She poked her head out from the office just in time to see a tall blonde woman hurriedly slip between the shelves. She craned her neck out further to examine her windows, hoping this wasn’t some action-movie chase scene culminating in the explosion of her little book store. She shook her head—it’s not weird to run into a book store in a hurry, right? 

Was it weird?

A porcelain skull sporting a rabbit-eared headband grinned at her from beside the register. It had been there since last Easter, and—okay, maybe she lost touch of what normal was, so really, she shouldn’t judge. Be reasonable, she silently chastised—the woman was just a regular customer. 

Nico hesitated. 

Okay, maybe it had been a while since she had to talk to a customer too. It was rarely busy enough for her to intervene if Molly was here. If she wanted to talk to strangers, she wouldn’t need to hire anybody. Or beg Molly to work for her. For free. 

You’re the boss, she reminded herself. This is your job. 

But people were so complicated. And small talk? With her imagination still limited by the ignorance of the the many weeks to come, Nico couldn’t think of anything more unpleasant than small talk. 

Okay. Okay, okay, okay. Nico took a deep breath, peeled herself away from the door frame and slowly made her way over to the shelves. 

The blonde woman stood with her fingers on the shelf, so tense she may as well have been hanging off the side of a cliff. Her eyes, hidden behind a pair of large, silver-rimmed sunglasses, seemed focused only on the space above the books. Nico followed her line of sight past her shelf and through the window. 

Nico’s brows furrowed. This was not weird at all. Right?

She turned back to the woman, whose profile looked vaguely familiar. Strange, she thought. Surely, she would remember a beautiful woman like her. She mentally shook off the feeling—talking to customers was hard enough without this other nonsense. Besides, this was L.A.—every gorgeous human looked vaguely familiar. The entertainment industry was insidious. 

You can do this, she told herself once more. Faking her courage with a smile, Nico finally cleared her throat. “Um, hi.” 

The woman jumped, then turned to Nico with an expression obscured by her sunglasses. 

“Are you…okay?” Nico asked slowly. “Can I help you find something?” 

The woman studied her for a long moment. Nico shifted uncomfortably, then cleared her throat one more time, just loud enough to snap the woman out of her sudden trance. “Oh!” She mumbled, “No, um, I’m okay. Thanks.” 

“Well, um, if you’re looking for Transcendental Magic, I can get you the English translation,” Nico said, gesturing to the book that the woman had pulled out. “Unless…you can read French?” 

The woman seemed to stare at the book in her hand, perhaps confused by the slight pursing of her lips. She slid the book back on the shelf. “Not sure how that got there,” she murmured to herself. 

“Uh, well, is there anything else you’re interested in? I can give you a couple of recommendations or something.” 

The woman glanced around the back of the shelf, then over the tops of the books. She seemed no less restless when she finally drew her attention back to Nico and sighed. She pushed her sunglasses to the top of her head. 

Her gorgeous blue eyes sent a jolt right through Nico. 

But she had no time to process—no time to form the words to explain away this feeling of…connection?—when the woman suddenly grabbed her arm half a second later, sending a second jolt down from the sky to strike her heart right out of her chest. 

“Listen, um, can you just…hide me here for a bit? I’m really sorry to trouble you, I’m just—I don’t want them to find me.” 

“A-Are you in trouble? Should we call the police?”

The woman released her hand, frazzled. “What? No! I’m, uh, it’s hard to explain…I mean—wait,” she tilted her head slightly, “do you—do you not know who I am?” 

Nico pulled back to put some distance between herself and this strange woman. “Should I?” She asked. 

The woman’s eyes widened in a moment of shock, then relief gave way to a bright, beautiful smile. “No. And I’m glad.”

Nico’s eyes narrowed. “Okay?” 

“So the situation is that I’m avoiding my manager. You see, um, I…I’m…okay, I just really need a nap. Just a moment to breathe and to—to be away from all this for a little while, you know?” 

“O…kay?”

“Sorry, I don’t mean to be so enigmatic—I’m just having some trouble finding my words, which is…unusual, uh, I guess. You’re really, um…okay, no.” The woman sucked in a big breath to calm herself before starting again, hands raised as if in surrender. “Look, I—”

“Uh, well, my apartment is upstairs if you want to take a nap,” Nico blurted. 

The woman stared at Nico. 

Nico stared back in horror. There were a lot of things she wanted to say, mostly excuses to get out of this conversation, but that was definitely not on the list. 

Then, woman brightened. “Really?” 

Well, fuck. 

“Yeah, of course. You can sleep as long as you want.” 

What? No.

Just fucking give her your kidney while you’re at it, Nico thought. 

“Oh my god. Thank you. Thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

“Follow me,” Nico said, barely managing to hide her scowl. Follow me as I leap into a river to escape the scourge of beautiful L.A. models and other celebrity types before they take everything I own, she thought bitterly. 

This was why Nico did not like people. They were just so goddamn unpredictable. 

Across the office, next to the island where the till sat beside her bleeding red spreadsheets, was a narrow set of stairs that led to her quaint little one-bedroom apartment. It was here, between the scratched up beige walls and creaky steps that the woman finally asked for her name. 

“Nico,” she replied. “What about you?” 

The woman hummed. “Kar,” she said after some thought. “Or maybe Karrie…”

Nico turned. “Carl?” 

The woman laughed. “No, Kar. It’s short for Karolina.” She gasped, her hand flying to her mouth like a cartoon character. “Dammit,” she whispered. 

“Relax,” Nico chuckled. “You look familiar but everyone sort of does around here, y’know? Here we are.” 

The red door at the top of the steps led to a sparse but inviting living room. Sunlight streamed through the open curtains and across the coffee table, where an open book sat beside an unlit candle. There was a plush love seat, deep burgundy in colour, with soft pillows and a quilted blanket neatly folded on one side. Two austere bookshelves stood sentry to the bedroom, crammed full of books and museum-like trinkets. 

Nico closed the door behind her. “You can sleep here if you want,” she said, gesturing to the love seat. “Uh, you’re a bit…tall, but it should be okay. I usually take up one couch cushion when I curl up, so…that was a weird thing to say.” 

She looked up to find Karolina smiling, her gaze warm and velvety and kind of sweet and why couldn’t she look away? 

“I really appreciate this, Nico,” she said, her voice equally syrupy. Nico nodded, then stiffened when Karolina unexpectedly placed both hands on her shoulders and leaned over to plant a kiss on her cheek. “Thanks again.” 

“Uh—right. W-well, um, I’ll be downstairs. You, uh, make yourself comfortable. And don’t steal anything, I guess?” Nico mumbled. 

“I won’t,” Karolina chuckled. 

“Okay.”

Nico quickly ducked back through the door and down the stairs before she could think about how warm her cheeks felt and how much she wanted to set herself on fire after that interaction. 

Thankfully, Molly was already back in the book store with breakfast on the counter and her hands on her hips. 

“Nico!” She sighed, by way of greeting, “Are you slacking off?” 

Nico quickly shook her head, her eyes flicking toward the staircase beside her and Molly’s face. 

Molly raised a brow. “Are you okay?” 

“Um, yes? No? I don’t know?” 

“Did something happen while I was gone?” 

Nico bit her lip. Should she tell Molly she was harbouring some hot fugitive actor or model? She had no idea what she was doing, and she could probably use a level head. Plus, she trusted Molly more than anyone. 

So why didn’t she want to tell her about Karolina? 

“Nico?” Molly asked, visibly concerned now. 

“I…uh…it’s—it’s nothing.”

“Okay, now I’m suspicious.” Molly frowned. “Did you do something?” 

“What? No!” 

“Oh my god, were you just hiding in your room eating chocolate again?” 

Nico blinked, unsure how to feel about her shameful habits paying off this way. “Maybe?” She said, cringing.

“Dude, stop doing that, you weirdo!” Molly cried, shoving her lightly in the shoulder. 

Nico laughed nervously. “I’ll try.”

“Alright, c’mon let’s eat some real food. I got breakfast burritos.”

When Molly turned to roll open the brown paper bag on the counter, Nico released a breath and felt the pressure run off in waves. That was miraculously close.

* * *

Two hours later—one customer and two window shoppers later—Nico handed Molly a ten and sent her out on a coffee run. Molly had narrowed her eyes and made her promise not touch the candy stash while she was gone, but didn’t seem to suspect anything else. As Nico ascended the stairs again, she pressed a hand to her heart and, unsurprisingly, found little relief there despite the victory.

There was still the much bigger problem that had been plaguing her all morning: the beautiful stranger that she, Nico Minoru, willingly allowed into her home, her sanctuary, because what the hell was wrong with her? 

She turned the brass doorknob on the door, palm damp against the cool metal, and cautiously cracked it open. 

Her quilt laid crumpled on her couch. The pillow sagged in the middle—definitely slept on. The stranger just took a nap. It wasn’t a big deal. Except...it was deathly quiet, and there wasn’t a body in sight. 

Nico’s heart dropped as she bolted into her living room. When did she vanish? Did she somehow slip past her downstairs? Oh god, what did she take? Everything seemed to be in place. She didn’t have many valuables. Surely the cash register would be easier to rob. Unless this was a diversion? What if—

“Oh! Hello.” 

Nico whipped around and nearly knocked over the ceramic vase on the shelf she was in the middle of frantically inspecting. Here in her home—her slice of heaven, her haven from the outside world—now suddenly stood a beautiful stranger in her bedroom. Skin flushed and fully naked under a fluffy pink towel—her fluffy pink towel—with her damp, dark blonde hair slicked back and water dripping all over her floor. 

Are you fucking kidding me? Nico’s frazzled brain cried in exasperation. 

“Uh—?”

“Oh! Sorry, um, hope you don’t mind me borrowing your shower. I thought it would wake me up before I get back out there,” the woman—Karolina, Nico reminded herself distractedly—said with a sheepish smile. “I love your shampoo.” 

“Thanks?” Why did she have to punctuate every sentence with a question mark when it came to this woman? 

“Do you…um, is it okay if I borrow a shirt from you? Mine is…crumpled,” Karolina continued. This time, her cheeks grew several shades rosier. 

No, get out of my house, Nico’s brain said. 

It was her heart, however—or perhaps something else she couldn’t suppress in time—that bravely (or foolishly) stride past the naked woman into her bedroom and threw open her closet. 

“I don’t know if anything will fit,” Nico mumbled. 

“Crop tops are fashionable,” Karolina replied. 

Nico turned to her, thoroughly unimpressed. 

“Sorry,” Karolina said with a breezy, melodic laugh, “you’re cute, so I’m sure anything is fine.” 

“Oh.” Nico blushed. “Thanks?”

Karolina’s eyes widened. “I-I mean you’re clothes are cute. So I trust your judgment. Not that you’re not cute. You are. But your clothes. You get it.” 

Her laughter quickly dissolved into nervous giggles, and Nico would laugh too if her heart wasn’t hanging out in her throat after Karolina’s bumbling compliment. “Yeah, okay” she said instead, sporting matching pink cheeks. “Do you have a coat? I’ll lend you a sweater if you don’t.” 

Karolina shook her head. “I guess you can say I was pretty distracted when I stormed off set.” 

“You’re not one of those famous divas, are you?” Nico asked, returning her eyes to the mission at hand as she rifled around her closet. It suddenly felt very important to give away the perfect piece of clothing to this naked stranger. And it had nothing to do with avoiding Karolina’s amazing blue eyes. 

“Not usually,” Karolina chuckled. “But there’s only so many times they can make you kiss a sexist pig before you absolutely lose it.” 

“He wasn’t messing up on purpose, was he?” Nico pulled out a large navy sweater from her closet, and held it to her chest, her brows knitting thoughtfully. “Aren’t you famous? I might live under a rock but you seemed so shocked that I didn’t know you that I figured you must be pretty famous. Or just really full of yourself, I guess.”

“I guess I’m sort of famous? Which…saying that out loud makes me seem like I’m full of myself, doesn’t it?” Karolina said, rubbing her arm with a small smile. “You’ve back me into a bit of a corner here, Nico.”

Nico shrugged. “I just mean, like, if you’re famous, why would they let him do that to you? Obviously he shouldn’t be pulling that kind of shit on anybody, but people care about their actors, don’t they? Especially if they’re, y’know, well-loved and stuff.”

Karolina shook her head. “It’s…complicated sometimes. This business. Even if I were to make those accusations, the director is, like, his best friend. Nobody would do anything. It’s just a job, we all think. It’s harmless, and really, it is. We’re all professionals, and I…wouldn’t want that kind of publicity anyway, so I just…got out of there.”

“Are you going to be in trouble?” 

“No, I don’t think so. Maybe just with my manager,” Karolina said. “We wrapped early after the drama. We’ve been at it since four, so early is relative, but—either way…you hiding me here—I can’t tell you how much this means.” 

Nico nodded. “You’re welcome, I guess. And here—my dad’s sweater.”

“Your dad’s?”

“Yeah, I stole it last year when my family went back to Japan for New Years. It’d been so long since we’d gone back that I forgot how cold it gets over there. We were pretty far out in the countryside, so…I stole my dad’s sweater.” 

Karolina took the sweater and relaxed into a grin. “It’s so soft! I’ll be sure to return it in one piece.”

“You better,” Nico said, flashing a small half-smile. “He’s gonna cry if he finds out I gave away his sweater, and I don’t need that kind of stress right now.” 

“Gotcha.” 

“Yep.”

For a long while, they simply stood there, unsure what to say as they threw glances at and around each other, an unexpectedly charged current running through them—it had been there since the beginning, but the silence revealed it like sunshine behind self-made clouds. 

Later, Nico would spend hours upon hours replaying this moment until she could convince herself she didn’t really have the kind of courage that incited this moment. It must’ve been the work of the universe. The gods piloting her will. Or something in Karolina’s eyes. 

But they would both remember the way Karolina had leaned in with the intention to press a kiss on Nico’s cheek, just like she had earlier that morning. They would both remember Nico turning slightly at the very last moment, and the shared surprise when their lips brushed instead. 

Later, in their private moments, they would both recall the exact sensation of Nico’s fingertips burning suddenly against Karolina’s cheek, and soft lips colliding a second time, firm and deliberate, slipping into place as if they were made for each other. The gentle push and pull. Nico’s back hitting the closet door. Karolina’s damp hair in Nico’s hands. It was only a moment. Only a handful of seconds, barely enough to carve half a minute between them. But it left them both breathless. 

“I should change,” Karolina whispered as she pulled away. 

“Uh, yeah.”

Nico stayed rooted moments after Karolina disappeared, simply unable to escape the moment. The vision of those darkened blue eyes and the low timbre of her voice. The pounding in her chest. And worst of all, the acute ache of longing she knew so well. 

Slowly, she touched her lips. What the hell just happened? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I hope everyone is doing well and staying safe in these trying times. I’ve been working for this story for a few months now, and I think it’s finally ready to be shared with everyone. 
> 
> I’ve been reading the comics thanks to a very pushy person I know, and I have to admit I’m grateful for their tenacity. Deanoru is a beautiful journey that doesn’t need to be replicated in the same universe, but I’m glad I could add at least one more story to the many universes where their worlds collide. 
> 
> For now, rest assured that this story is complete. I didn’t think I’d pull off another story after My Heart for a Song, but here we are! I’ll be posting whenever I am satisfied with the editing, so I hope you’ll stay tuned. 
> 
> Comment, kudo, subscribe—it’s all appreciated :)


	2. Chapter 2

  
Two weeks later, Nico was sitting behind the counter, absently reaching into the bag of M&Ms beside her while agonizingly and staring into space while trying not to think about Karolina. Or the kiss. Or the whirlwind goodbye that came later. 

Or the fact that she suddenly saw Karolina Dean everywhere. 

Yep. 

Karolina Dean. Just your average A-list celebrity whose posters hang in millions of bedrooms to be stared at longingly. 

Sorta famous my ass, she thought sullenly as she shoved a handful of M&Ms into her mouth. 

No, she couldn’t go anywhere without seeing her beautiful goddamn face. She modelled perfume on one bulletin board and held homeless puppies on another. Magazine covers loved her. She couldn’t even watch YouTube without seeing movie trailers with her leaping across buildings in all of her sweaty, sexy glory. 

But what was the point of day dreaming about her when the red numbers on her spreadsheets mocked her every day? Just because she let her borrow her dad’s sweater? 

God, she looked so good in that sweater, Nico thought, slowly laying her forehead down on the counter. Why? Why did I kiss her? She moaned inwardly. What was I thinking? I wasn’t thinking. Why wasn’t I thinking? 

Stop haunting me and give me back my peaceful little life, Karolina Dean, she inwardly groaned. 

“Woah, you okay, boss?” Molly asked as she came out from the back room. 

“Fine,” she mumbled, unable to find the energy to lift her head. 

“Who did you kiss?”

Her head snapped up so fast she almost fell off her chair. “W-what? What are you talking about?” 

Molly leaned against the counter now, one hand on her hip with one eyebrow cocked. “You just said, ‘Why did I kiss her?’”

“I did?” 

Shit. Fuck. Damn. 

“Yeah. Practically shouted it. So? Who was it? Do I know her?” 

Nico rapped her head against the surface of the counter several times, just hard enough to confirm that she was, in fact, not trapped in a never-ending nightmare. 

“Does this mean I do know her?” 

She could almost hear the teasing smile in Molly’s voice, and she just wanted the ground to open up below her and swallow her whole. “Sort of, I guess,” she grumbled begrudgingly. “You probably do.” You probably know her better than me, she held back from adding. 

“Who is it?”

“I can’t say.” 

“What? Why not?” 

Yes, why not? Nico wondered. Even if it was a ridiculously masochistic crush, it felt like telling someone might betray Karolina somehow, and she couldn’t explain why. It wasn’t like she would see her again. Perhaps it was because she didn’t know whether Karolina was out. She’d been too afraid to Google her, afraid of what she might find. Scandals. Controversies. Her net worth. Photos of her with random lovers. 

Or maybe it was a secret she didn’t want to share. If she rationalized it, she might wake up to realize it was all a dream. While a vivid dream would be the easiest answer to moving on from all this, it didn’t bring any sense of relief. Not even the bittersweet kind. The thrill of her soft lips, tender touch, and soulful eyes—no, she didn’t want to believe her imagination would conjure these up just to torment her with them. 

“I just can’t,” she told Molly. 

“Why the heck are you being so weird?” Molly said, throwing up her hands. “Is this person married or something?” 

“Uh, I don’t know.” 

“What do you mean you don’t—did you kiss some stranger on the street? It’s not that soap and honey lady from the market is it? I mean, that wouldn’t be a bad thing. She’s been flirting with you forever.”

Nico lifted her head and rolled her eyes. “No, it’s not her. Can we just drop it? I’m going to work on a spell tonight and this is all going to go away and we’ll never talk about this again.” 

“Nico,” Molly said disapprovingly. “I’m not your employee, you know. I’m your friend. And as your friend, I’m here to listen.” 

“It’s really not—”

The door clacked open and in walked a woman in a baseball cap and black sunglasses, dressed head to toe in designer athletic wear save for the paper bag in one hand. 

“Hello!” Molly greeted cheerfully. 

“Hey, how are you?” The woman smiled back. Her smile only broadened as she made her way to the counter. “Hi, Nico.”

Nico’s stomach flipped. She’d recognize that syrupy voice even if it wasn’t plaguing her dreams every night. 

“…Hi.”

Molly eyes flickered between the woman and Nico before giving Nico a very expectant look, to which Nico responded with a glare. 

Karolina took off her sunglasses and Nico inwardly cursed—those eyes were even more mesmerizing than she remembered. “We’re back here today and tomorrow, so I thought I’d drop by. I have a gift for you. To say thank you, of course,” she added quickly. 

Suddenly, Molly gasped loudly. “Oh my god, are you—wow, you’re—”

Karolina winced. “Um, I’d appreciate it if—”

“I loved Twilight! I mean, when I was a kid I used to watch it every day. You were so cool, and your new movie, and-and—” 

Karolina blinked as Molly went on on. When the initial confusion and surprise passed, her lips broke into a smile. “I’m so sorry to interrupt you,” she said with a giggle, “but I’m not Kristen Stewart. You seem like a big fan, so I’d hate to disappoint. Ah, it’s okay, really—don’t look so sad—it happens more often than you might think. I guess it’s probably because Kristen and I have a couple of things in common?” 

Molly leaned back, so horrified that she accidentally knocked over the rabbit-eared skull. Her reflexes kicked in, thankfully, reaching for the skull and juggling it in the air for a moment before finally catching it and hugging it around her chest, as if trying to hide behind it. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. That was—I don’t even know how I—you don’t look—obviously, you’re—you’re Karolina Dean! Obviously. Wow, I can’t believe—oh my god, I’m so embarrassed. I’m really, really sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Karolina assured with an amused grin. “I’ll be sure to pass on your kind words to Kristen next time we run into each other. Would you mind if I steal Nico for a second? I just need to talk to her about something.”

“O-oh, um, yeah, sure. Of course. I’ll, uh, watch the store?”

“Thanks!” 

Nico cast one more look at the dazed, wide-eyed expression on Molly’s face, then quickly followed Karolina toward the staircase before Molly could wake up and interrogate her. She was not looking forward to that interrogation. 

Before Karolina could go up the staircase and plow them both through memory lane, Nico took her hand and dragged her across the narrow hall and into the office. Once inside, she closed the door and turned to find Karolina grinning widely at her as she swung their joined hands slightly. 

“Hi again,” she said softly. 

“You came back,” Nico said incredulously. “And somehow… you managed to make Molly speechless. That’s...impressive. Are you… here to return my sweater?”

“No,” she said with a sheepish smile. “I came to give you this.” 

Karolina extended the bag to Nico, but just as she wrapped her fingers around the woven handle, she tugged the bag toward her, pulling Nico into her arms and into her kiss. Nico could feel her whole body warm, melting like chocolate on her tongue as she wrapped her arms around Karolina. When they broke for air, Karolina tightened her hold around Nico, wrapping her up in a perfect embrace.

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you, Nico—is that crazy?” 

“No…I don’t think so. I don’t know. I don’t really understand it myself,” Nico sighed against her chest. “If I wasn’t missing a sweater, I don’t think I would’ve believed anything happened two weeks ago. Like I dreamt you up somehow.”

“I feel the same way,” Karolina murmured against her hair. “It’s all so surreal.” 

“You’re telling me,” Nico scoffed. “I haven’t been able to stop seeing your face everywhere I go, and I don’t even mean that in a cheesy pop song way. Your face is literally everywhere. And now you’re here.”

“I am. I had to see you again.”

“Why?”

“A couple of reasons,” she replied with a shy smile. “This.” Karolina offered the bag once more.

When they broke apart, Nico immediately felt the loss. It was too much to think about right now. Too much to articulate. Too much to fear from an attraction so immediate and so, so intense. Too much to lose with so much on the line. She swallowed, took the paper bag and peered inside. 

Dark purple nestled between the pink tissue paper. 

“Is this a…sweater?”

“Yes. For you.”

“What about my dad’s sweater?”

“Well,” Karolina said with a spark of mischief in her eyes, “I’m not ready to let go of that one yet. Are you?”

“You’re not ready to…” she whispered under her breath in disbelief. Nico shook her head. “I…I can wait. As long as you take care of it.”

“Good. We won’t make your dad cry. Now, um, I need to ask you something. The real reason I came here today.”

“What?”

“Do you…maybe want to have dinner with me tonight?” 

Nico’s heart leapt forward before her reason could hesitate. “Okay.”

* * *

  
At precisely seven o’ clock that evening, Molly was struck speechless a second time when a large man, looking like the Terminator in a tight black shirt and sunglasses, came to take Nico away by the order of one “Ms. Dean”. Nico, who was torn between fearing for her life and fearing for her sanity after fighting off Molly’s endless questions all day, chose to trust Karolina and risk her life by following the man into an expensive black car with tinted windows. 

“Ms. Dean—er, Karolina, now that it’s just the two of us—is sorry she couldn’t come pick you up herself,” the man said. Once they were safely inside, the man took off his sunglasses. He had kind eyes, Nico supposed when she met them through the rear-view mirror. “She had an interview this afternoon, and she was worried that the reporters might be on her tail. Rumours have been circulating since she stormed off set few weeks back. You know how it is.” 

“Uh, yeah. Sure.”

“I’m Chase, by the way,” the man said with a dimpled smile. “Officially, I’m her personal bodyguard. Unofficially, I also extend my services to dealing with and protecting Karolina from unreasonable industry folk, and,” he gave Nico a look, “broken hearts.”

“I see.”

Chase chuckled as they came to a red light. “There’s no need to look so scared,” he said, turning to flash her another smile. “Karolina is one of my oldest friends, and there’s nothing more important to me than seeing her happy. She’s had a bad week, but seeing you today made her very happy, so I’m rooting for you, you know. Even if it makes her a little reckless.”

“You mean she doesn’t usually invite herself into strangers’ showers and take their clothes?” Nico asked with a raised brow. 

Chase laughed loudly, and the sound was deep and wide, his eyes twinkling in the mirror like a mischievous older brother. “God, no! No matter what the press thinks, Karolina has always been a goody two-shoes. She tried being rebellious in college once when she went out and smoked a joint, but her manager at the time lost her shit and she never did it again. I think she spends most of her free time—and she doesn’t have much of it, as you can imagine—sitting in a rocking chair with a cup of tea and her crocheting. Needless to say, I’m super proud of her being so bold with you.”

“That sounds cute. Wouldn’t have guessed.”

“It’s sad is what it is.”

Nico shrugged. “If it makes her happy.” 

Chase grinned. “Yeah. Whatever makes her happy.”

Half an hour later, they arrived at a large two-storey Spanish-style home. Chase opened the door for Nico, then intercepted the large, happy dogs waiting by the gate. “Extra security,” Chase explained. “Let them smell you first, but they’re not barking so you should be okay. They can probably smell traces of Karolina on you,” he added with a smirk. He opened the gate. “Go ahead. I’ll get in if they pounce on you.”

Oh, god, Nico thought, inching toward the dogs slowly as she mustered the strength to drag her reluctant body forward. She liked dogs—she really did—but the two Great Danes, one black and one speckled grey, seemed like they would tower over her if they stood. Luckily, the dogs sniffed her hand and trotted beside her, watching with wagging tails. Chase jogged up a few moments later and pointed to the black dog. “That one’s Bacon, and the other one is Eggs.” He grinned. “Karolina named them when they were puppies—thought it might be funny because she can’t eat either of those things. Clearly, she didn’t think about how weird it would be to be shouting things like, ‘Eggs! Let go of that poor paparazzo!’” 

Nico couldn’t help but laugh, managing to relax a little when Chase placed a hand on Bacon’s broad head and motioned for her to do the same with Eggs. Eggs nudged her hand with his nose, and she rewarded him with a grin and a quick scratch behind the ear. 

Chase beamed proudly. “Good dogs, aren’t they?”

She liked Chase, Nico decided as they headed toward the house. He had a light-hearted way about him that made him easy to like, and there was an easiness about him that she couldn’t help but admire. The little insights on Karolina didn’t hurt either. 

“The dogs seem to trust you,” Chase said, nudging Nico lightly with his shoulder. “It’s a good sign, you know. Dogs are a very good judge of character, so they say. Here we are.” He opened the front door and waved her inside. “Up the stairs and to the right.” 

It was a beautiful home, warm and earthy, with an elegantly tiled set of stairs curving along the foyer. Expensive-looking paintings hung along the wall and plants decorated every expensive-looking surface. Nico went up slowly, taking it all in while Chase locked the door. She wondered if this was Karolina’s home. It was nice, she thought, but awfully empty and impersonal. 

She was almost at the top when a voice caught her attention. 

“Nico! You made it!” 

Karolina met her on the stairs like a whirlwind, scooping her up in a warm, excited hug. Several beats passed before Nico managed to re-engage her brain and return the hug. 

“Hi,” Nico said with a half-smile. “You invited me, you know.” 

“I know, but,” Karolina blushed and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, “I’m just so excited that you’re here. I hope Chase didn’t embarrass you too much. Or me, for that matter.” 

Nico shook her head and without thinking, slipped her hand into Karolina’s. She was rewarded with a big smile, then allowed herself to be led down the hallway. 

“I’m still here, guys,” Chase hollered from a few steps below them.

Karolina turned and stuck her tongue out at him. “Don’t bodyguards usually try to blend into the wallpaper?”

“Not if the client is rude,” Chase snickered. 

Karolina sighed dramatically. “Can you hang out downstairs and, I don’t know, search for paparazzi or something while we’re upstairs? I’ll ask Victor to bring you some chicken.” 

“Alright, fine, I see how it is,” Chase pouted, turning around and heading down the steps dejectedly. “I’ll keep my earpiece in. Victor owes me a couple rounds of Madden anyway.” 

Nico followed Karolina along the upstairs landing and out onto a large balcony overlooking a pool and the distant neighbourhoods below. At the centre of the balcony was a round table, complete with the velvet tablecloth, understated flower arrangement, and a vaguely-floral-scented candle—right out of mythical romances Nico never quite understood until this moment. 

“Welcome, ladies.” 

Standing by the table with a bottle of wine was a handsome man with a glorious mane of slicked-back hair, a white T-shirt, and the candlelight dancing in his dark eyes. A dimple punctuated both sides of his smile as he placed the wine on the table and opened his arms. “And you must be Nico,” he said, offering his hand. “I’ve heard so much about you. I’m Victor.” 

Nico raised a brow. “You have?” 

But they barely knew each other, she thought. And why wasn’t Karolina meeting her eye? Instead, she was clearing her throat. “Victor is Hollywood’s greatest gift, you know. His culinary prowess is just amazing and it really got me through some tough times.” 

“I guess that’s my cue. I’ll be right back with your meal,” Victor said with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. 

Once the door to the balcony closed, Nico released Karolina’s hand to cross her arms. “So…Victor’s heard a lot about me, has he?” She asked with a smirk. 

“Let me get this,” Karolina said quickly. She pulled out her chair, and Nico stared at it in confusion, then at the very surreal Karolina Dean, who looked like a goddess in tulle against the candlelit night sky. 

Unused to the chivalry, Nico took her seat and allowed herself to be pushed in, but felt awkward, her entire body stiff and out of place. They exchanged uncomfortable smiles across the table, and curiously, m Karolina could not seem to meet her eyes. Interesting, Nico thought, though neither quite knew what to say. Then, she noticed the pink shades across Karolina’s fair skin—it was so entertaining that it must’ve made her bold. “So, what did you tell Victor?” She asked, slowly, teasingly, almost—to her own surprise—enticingly. 

“Uh,” Karolina cleared her throat, “I, um, just told Victor and Chase the story…of—of how we met, you know?” Karolina mumbled. She bit her lip, her eyes darting from Nico’s face to the flower arrangement at the center of the table. “I just…told them how kind you were. To me. Normal stuff like that.” 

“I think her specific words were that you—Nico—are, quote, the most magnificent creature to walk this Earth,” Victor said with a triumphant grin as he suddenly reappeared with one large plate in each hand. “It was very sweet and very poetic. For an encounter that I understand to be…not so much. So sorry about your floors, Nico. They must’ve been very wet,” he added with a wink. 

“Oh,” Nico said when all other words failed. Karolina’s face lit up brighter still, but the warmth in her own cheeks told her she likely wasn’t faring much better, the surge of courage entirely undone by the genuine embarrassment on Karolina’s face after Victor’s little revelation. She kept her eyes down, her heart impossibly erratic yet full all at once. 

“Victor!” Karolina cried. “You traitor!”

“Come on now, you two,” Victor chuckled as he served the two plates in his hands. “A little honesty won’t hurt on a first date. I’m just helping you out, Kar.” To Nico, he lowered his head in a stage whisper. “Karolina is both hopeless and useless with women. You’d never know it from from the powerful-strong-independent-woman vibes she has for the cameras, but she’s a very sensitive soul. A useless one at that.”

“Hey!” 

But Victor ignored her and the prominent pout she now sported. “Tonight, we will be serving two courses,” he went on. “The first, I will be dishonouring my mother’s recipe with a vegan black bean enchilada—Karolina’s favourite. It’s a homemade corn tortilla stuffed with black beans, tofu, and a delicate mix of spices, served with a cashew cream infused with cilantro and lime. And for dessert, I made more of those chocolate cinnamon paletas that you like, Karolina. Dairy-free, of course. Made with coconut cream and dark chocolate. I wasn’t sure if you were a raging carnivore like myself, or if you had any other dietary restrictions, Nico, but I’m very happy to whip something else up for you if you like?” 

“Oh! No, this seems…really great. It looks and smells very good. Thank you.” 

“Thank you, Victor. I hate you for teasing me, but I can’t hate you when your food always looks so good,” Karolina said. “I know these dishes don’t help your Mancha pride, but thanks for always being so accommodating.”

“It’s fine, Kar. Helps me broaden my own horizons,” Victor said, puffing his chest out proudly. “Besides, it’s more of the real food for me and Chase. Is there anything else I can get for the two of you before I head downstairs?” 

Karolina shook her head. “You two have fun. I’ll text if I need anything.” 

“Awesome. Enjoy yourselves tonight!” With one last wave and a brilliant toothpaste-commercial grin, Victor took his leave. 

“Wow,” Nico chuckled. “You’ve got some pretty great friends.”

“They’re not too much, are they?” Karolina asked with an uneasy laugh. “I hope Victor’s comment didn’t make you uncomfortable. If it did, that makes both of us.” 

“I don’t think anybody has been called ‘magnificent’ for a hundred years, so it’s…pretty flattering, I guess,” Nico replied with a lop-sided smile. “Have you been vegan for a long time?”

Karolina nodded as she picked up her knife and fork. “My whole life. My parents were in the business too, and they were always a bit…intense about health and stuff—to put it mildly. In a way that’s…not actually healthy, you know? I tried not to get too swept up in the bad stuff, but I can’t say I’ve had the healthiest relationship with food. Until I met Victor, of course. In a lot of ways, he and Chase really saved me.” She then took a bite of the filling that had spilled out of her enchilada, and broke into a grin. “Yep, this definitely hits the spot.” 

While Karolina spoke, Nico poked around her plate first, not sure how to make her plan of attack. Karolina ate so neatly—the last thing she wanted was to somehow manage to get food all over herself like a toddler. 

Karolina, however, immediately dropped her smile when her eyes fell to Nico’s untouched plate. “Oh no…I’ve been selfish, haven’t I? Oh, Nico, if you…um, I should’ve asked what kind of food you like. You were so polite with Victor—I’m sure he won’t mind making something else for you.” 

Nico looked up, confused. “What? No, it’s fine, I just…didn’t want to make a mess,” she mumbled with a blush. Not in front of you, she added silently. 

“Oh…sorry, ugh, I didn’t mean to make it a whole thing—I’m…I don’t do this very often, and…”

The discomfort in Karolina’s face was more than a little obvious, and though her concern was endearing and sweet, Nico wanted to kiss it right off. The thought caught her off-guard, and she quickly filed it in the very back of her brain in alarm. “You know,” Nico said quickly to change the subject, “I won’t pretend I know what it’s like to feel the pressure of looking perfect for the world every day, but…if we’re being honest, my relationship with food is pretty shitty too. If it weren’t for Molly, I’d run solely on coffee and chocolate, so…I can imagine how important it is to have someone like Victor in your corner. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m not…very good at this either? I mean, I don’t think I’ve had a home cooked meal in months. Maybe a year? My dad is a great cook, but—our relationship is complicated, so I won’t get into it. Point is, I’m grateful.” She mustered a small smile and took a bite, her eyes immediately widening. “And this is delicious. I know it’s vegan, but somehow, this sauce—how was this a bag of cashews this morning?”

Karolina relaxed her shoulders slightly, though her smile was still tense. “I’m glad you like it. Thank you, Nico. For being so understanding…even though I’m…probably going to say the wrong thing more than once tonight.” She paused and released a shaky breath. “Maybe I watch too many films and don’t spend enough time in reality,” Karolina said, cutting into the tortilla. “My life is…so often scripted—it’s easier that way, I suppose. Sometimes I don’t think I remember what it’s like to go off-script and…live life without worrying about what other people think. I mean, what do people even do on dates?” 

Nico shrugged. “I don’t think people are all that complicated. They’re more boring than movies probably? Most of us just go to some overpriced equivalent of Starbucks and spend an hour mostly thinking about being somewhere else, yet desperately wishing the sparks will eventually fly. And at the end…maybe split a dessert if all goes well,” Nico said with a laugh. 

“Then, do you…um, do you usually…”

“Go on dates?” 

“Y-yeah. I mean, with women. Sorry, is that awkward to ask?”

There was something spectacularly darling about how easily Karolina got embarrassed, and god was it ever easy to get swept away by it all. 

Nico smiled and held her eyes above the flowers. “It’s not awkward at all,” she replied. “I’m not all that picky when it comes to gender. Not that it really matters lately. Honestly, I don’t think anybody has taken me on a date like this in a very long time. If ever? So…this is refreshing.”

Karolina gaped. “You’re joking! You must be.” 

“W-what do you mean?” 

“I-I mean you’re…magnificent, Nico—there’s no other word for you. There must be people falling over themselves to sit in my place right now.” 

Nico dropped the bite on her fork, stunned. Is this woman for real? She wondered in spite of the burning embarrassment in her ears. “Jeez, that’s…a bit much. I’m not really all that special, you know? Just your average grumpy bookworm who mostly wants to be left alone.” 

“Oh…” Karolina placed her fork on the placemat and hid her eyes with her hand. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Again. God, I’m bad at this, aren’t I? I just…I don’t know. We might not know each other very well, but there’s something about you that just seems…special. I-I mean—I can’t believe I’m the only one who could see something so…obvious?”

Karolina’s eyes sparked with such admiration that she could almost believe every word, but Nico hesitated. She looked down at her food and swallowed the instinct to push back against the compliments and run far, far away from here. “W-well, what about you?” She said instead. “Millions of people would literally sell their souls to sit in my seat right now—you probably wouldn’t even have to steal a sweater—and yet here we are.” 

Karolina dropped her hand, her uneasy smile dimming in a way that immediately seemed to tug Nico toward her. Nico leaned back, grounding herself in her chair, and held her breath, listening. “You know,” Karolina said, “fame is…not real. People want to see me the way I am in the light. They want to see me as somebody else, somebody that doesn’t exist in this world. It’s the paradox of belonging to the public. And I guess...it’s the paradox of privacy in this industry too. The more privacy you crave, the more everyone’s imaginations will run you into the ground. Because they all seem to know exactly who you are and how you should be—what you could be—and I… sometimes I can’t stand the disappointment.”

Nico nodded slowly, eating silently, chewing thoughtfully, for a few long moments. “I think in every relationship, there are expectations and illusions. And you—you’re high up there on that pedestal—I get it.” Then, she smiled. “Lucky for you, I’ve had to clean your hair out of my drain, so I’m keeping my expectations real low.” 

Karolina buried her face in her hands. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I thought I cleaned up, but I totally forgot about the drain.” She dropped her hands. “It won’t happen next time,” she said with a fiery determination that could only be described as adorable. 

“Next time? Someone is confident she’ll be invited into my bedroom again,” Nico said, laughing. She didn’t know where the quip came from, but she wasn’t about to question it because sure enough, Karolina’s cheeks lit up, as bright as the Fourth of July, and just like that the weight on her shoulders seemed to lift a little. 

“I-I just mean, like, if I, uh, had to clean. For whatever reason,” Karolina said, her hands gesturing erratically in front of her. “It doesn’t… have to be just, um, the bathroom. In your bedroom. Or—or anywhere in your apartment. I just mean in general. Oh Nico, you must think I’m such a disaster. I’m—I’m really not trying to be presumptuous. I hope you don’t think—”

“Karolina,” Nico laughed. “I was just teasing.” 

“Oh. You said it with such a straight face I thought you might be mad,” Karolina replied, flashing that sheepish smile Nico was starting to really adore. 

“You’ll get to know me.” 

Her smile widened, brightened, and turned into something else entirely. No, Nico thought absently, this was her favourite smile. The kind that was so brilliant she felt the corners of her own lips tug. 

“I can’t wait.”


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Nico still felt the airiness of last night fill up her chest. She didn’t know when she would be able to see her again, but Karolina seemed to have a way of stirring her up. She was sure, as she very nearly skipped down the familiar road from the coffee shop to her book store, that she hadn’t stopped smiling all morning. If she saw herself now, she wouldn’t recognize herself. Nico Minoru didn’t smile at strangers and baristas. And she certainly didn’t skip.

But when was the last time she wanted to so badly?

She reached the blue door of her bookshop, reaching into her pockets for her keys as she reflexively peered in through the window. 

Oh fuck. 

“Are you kidding me, Mols? You called the goddamn cavalry?” She muttered under her breath. She took a deep breath, laid her hand on the old brass handle, squeezed her eyes shut, and pushed inside, preparing for the worst. 

“Nico!” A familiar voice roared, “Where the hell have you been?” 

Nico flinched and slowly opened her eyes, forcing a smile. “Hi, Gert. How did you get in here?”

Gert crossed her arms, holding Molly’s key up like a middle finger, pissed. 

Nico nodded slowly as she slid behind the counter for safety. “So…it’s seven fifteen,” Nico explained. “I went to get coffee. Like I do. Every morning. I hope that’s okay with you. I didn’t know you were coming—did you…want something?” 

“Cut the bullshit, Minoru, and explain yourself. Where did you go last night? I texted you a million times after Molly came knocking on my door telling me you were taken by the goddamn Terminator!” Gert, who had been jabbing the counter emphatically, snatched the bag of Maltesers from Nico’s hand as soon as they materialized out of her purple bag. “And I told you to stop buying candy and go see a goddamn dentist!” 

Nico rolled her eyes. “That can’t be the only thing Molly told you, or I’m going to kill her myself.” 

“You leave Molly out of this, Nico,” Gert warned, angrily popping two pieces of chocolate into her mouth just to spite her. “Now, spill. I want to hear what happened from you. There better not be some weird publicity stunt involved. Or, worse, some culty scam bullshit or whatever.”

“Gert?” Nico sighed. 

“What?” She snapped.

“I’m sorry for not telling you,” she said, her eyes trained on the yellow string of her purple bag twirled around her fingers. 

“You should be!”

Nico nibbles on her bottom lip. “I honestly didn’t think anything would come out of this,” she said. “I didn’t even think I’d see her again until she came in yesterday. It’s…if it’s anything, it’s all pretty new.” 

“Fine,” she sighed, her features softening. “It’s fine, Nico. I’m just worried. And maybe a little jealous too. Molly got to meet your secret date before I even heard of her. I can’t believe…I mean, is it really her? How do you even know? You thought Leonardo DiCaprio was a perfume.”

Nico scoffed. “Believe me, I didn’t know. I thought she was just some Los Angeles cliché. Then it was like the universe couldn’t stop letting me know. There’s, like, two billboards of her on this block alone.”

“Wow,” Gert whispered, propping her elbow on the counter. A faraway look soon grew on her eyes. “Karolina Dean, huh? I don’t know much about her. The first _Helix_ wasn’t really my cup of tea, but I was _obsessed_ with the _Reptile Factory_ trilogy. She was so good. Like, probably the most memorable character after the deinonychus.” She slammed her palm down on the counter when a thought hit her. “She’s not cancelled, is she? She better not.”

“Uh, I don’t know? I haven’t looked her up.” 

“What? Why not?” Gert balked. “That’s, like, the first thing you should’ve done! Are you _kidding_ me, Nico?”

Nico shrugged. “Can I have my chocolate back?”

“No! You haven’t told me anything yet! Like, how concerned should I even be? But also, what is she like in person? God, I sound like teenager, and like, not even a woke one. Seriously—how did you even meet?”

“Calm down, Gert—it’s fine. I don’t even know if and when I’ll see her next, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves, alright?”

Gert opened her mouth, but in that exact moment, as luck would have it, the door clacked open and in stepped a familiar giant with the pretty face. 

“Chase? What are you doing here?” 

“Hey, Nico,” he said, flicking off his sunglasses like there was an explosion waiting to happen behind him. He stopped for a moment, brows raised slightly with interest, then grinned, his dimple aimed right at a mildly terrified Gert who was trying very hard to screw her displeasure into place. “And hello there, Nico’s friend.”

“Um, Chase, this is Gert. Gert, Chase. Karolina’s bodyguard, I guess.”

“Hey, Gert,” Chase said, his voice as low and smooth as it would go. 

Gert made a face, and it took every ounce of strength in Nico not to burst into laughter. Between Chase’s very obvious attempt to be cool and Gert’s very visceral reaction to such behaviour, Nico wasn’t sure which was funnier. 

“Dude, _what_ —unless you’re an _actual_ Terminator, this whole thing is a _lot_ ,” Gert replied, waving toward the black T-shirt, tight pants, and sunglasses dangling between his fingers. 

Chase looked down at his outfit like it was his first time seeing it. “Huh. Would you prefer if I ditch the shirt?” He said with a wink. 

Gert’s eyes widened, her cheeks a shade of pink Nico had never seen on her mostly-level-headed-if-at-times-somewhat-volcanic friend. “Uh, ew. No. Please don’t,” she said, scoffing quietly for added effect. Nico laughed lightly when she began inching back against the counter. For all the bravado Gert often carried, the fiery passion and the punk rock jacket on her back, she knew how easily felled she was by handsome men and women. They were not so different in that regard. 

“Chase, before you embarrass yourself,” Nico cut in before Gert became one with her counter, “why are you here?”

“Oh! Of course,” Chase said, letting out a breathy, embarrassed chuckle. “Ms. Dean would like to know if you’d like to join her for dinner tonight. Also, are those Maltesers? Can I have one?”

Gert cleared her throat and puffed out her chest. “Take the whole bag,” she demanded, placing the bag in his open palm. 

“Hey! That’s mine!” Nico cried. 

Chase raised a brow. 

“No, don’t give it to her,” Gert said firmly. “She calls it a sweet tooth, but what she actually has is a problem.”

“Oh,” Chase said, flashing a sympathetic smile as he opened up the bag, “Sorry, Nico, can’t turn down orders from a beautiful lady.” 

“Dude, are you kidding me? Those are expensive!” Nico said, reaching out for the bag. 

But Chase lifted it high above his head. “Sorry, my friend. Orders are orders. Besides, Whoppers are better anyway.”

“You are insane,” Nico huffed. 

Gert laughed, earning an unnoticed grin from Chase. “While we’re at it,” she said between giggles, “can you tell Ms. Dean that Nico won’t be joining her for dinner?” 

“Excuse me?” Nico snapped. 

Gert raised a hand. “Unless Ms. Dean would, in fact, like to join us for our friend Alex’s birthday party tonight.” 

“Oh fuck, is that today?” Nico groaned, forfeiting her fight for the Maltesers to throw herself back into her chair. 

“Yep,” Gert said, popping the ‘p’. “We’re waiving presents this year, so you better show up. Livvie is cooking, so we should be good. No need to grab a cheeseburger before the party.” 

“She said yes,” Chase said, looking up from his phone with a triumphant smile and a far-too-cheesy fist pump. “Are you cool with me tagging along as well?” He directed the question at Gert, who simply shrugged, her slight blush still visible to spite her scowl. 

“As long as you won’t interfere if I decide to ask Ms. Dean a couple of questions.”

“As long as you’re not holding a gun while you do it, I’m cool,” Chase replied raising his hands. 

“Okay, cool, so glad this has all been decided because apparent I don’t get to have say in this whole situation,” Nico grumbled. 

* * *

  
Karolina’s reception at the party was far less explosive than Nico had anticipated. Gert had thrown open the door and acknowledged Karolina with only a slight deer-in-the-headlights expression before doubling down on an exaggeratedly grim version of her usual apathetic scowl. 

“Use the shoe rack,” she demanded before disappearing into the living room. 

Nico rolled her eyes. “Don’t let Gert scare you. She’s just trying not to be intimidated by you. She probably just didn’t know what to do now that she’s realize you’re real. Plus, I think she’s a big fan?”

“Oh? Well, I like her,” Karolina said with a grin. “She’s blunt. Straight to the point.” 

“I’m going to do a sweep,” Chase said, shouldering past them. 

Karolina’s smile immediately fell. “Wait, Chase, that’s not necessary.”

“I don’t mind looking like a fool if it means you stay safe, Karolina. Better safe than sorry,” Chase replied, punctuating his loyalty with a two-finger salute and a boyish grin. 

Once Chase disappeared into the rest of the apartment, Nico offered a look of sympathy. “You can hang your coat up here on top of mine, then I can introduce you to my friends.” 

“Okay,” Karolina replied. She placed her boots beside Nico’s on the shoe rack like she’d been told. “I’m sorry about Chase,” she added, cringing. 

Nico watched as Karolina shuffled her coat off her shoulders and hung it, just as she’d asked. There was something oddly intimate about the way Karolina’s coat completely covered her own much smaller jacket, and the sight of it filled her with inexplicable warmth. “You’re an important person,” she said with a shrug, “to him and to the world. Although,” Nico lowered her voice, “between you and me, I don’t think he’s actually sweeping the place.”

Karolina furrowed her brows. “What do you mean?”

“I think he has a crush on Gert.”

“What? Really? Huh.” Karolina drew her eyes down the hall where Chase had disappeared into the rest of the apartment. “That’s kind of cute. Chase is kind of an idiot when he likes somebody though. I hope he doesn’t scare her away. We’re very similar that way.”

Nico hummed. “I think…Gert would secretly find it really cute. She’s the kind of person who would freak out when she realizes she really likes somebody, so I hope Chase is patient.” A playful smile tugged are the corner of her lips. “Gert and I are very similar that way.”

When realization dawned, Karolina mirrored her smile. “I’ll have to…tell Chase to keep that in mind.” She held Nico‘s eyes as she spoke, her expression pink and open to whatever Nico could offer, be it the dewy brightness of her eyes, the entire world, or nothing at all. And yet there was also hesitance. Or was it worry? Fear? “You know, Nico, I…” she trailed off and bit her lip. “M-maybe this is not the right time,” she mumbled. “But I just…I guess I wanted you to know that I…I, um, am really happy you’re letting me into your life like this.” She bent down then and surprised Nico with a peck on the lips. One that Nico found herself all too eager to return in that brief moment of contact. “I might embarrass myself—or you—but it really means a lot.” 

Nico’s eyes flickered between her lips and her eyes. “And on what planet would you be embarrassing?” She whispered distractedly. 

“I told you, Nico—fame isn’t real,” she chuckled. “It doesn’t hide anyone from the awkward mess they—I—can be.”

“Karolina,” Nico said, cupping her cheek with her free hand. “It’ll be fine. It’s just a tiny get-together. My friends are probably going to be twice as embarrassing. You’ve met Molly and Gert.” Emboldened by the sheepish smile across Karolina’s beautiful face and the hand that once again found its way to her own, Nico tiptoed slightly against her and pressed a second kiss to her lips. 

There were no words for how it felt when she felt Karolina respond, when they melted against each other like wax to seal a fate they hadn’t written yet. A fate Nico couldn’t admit to herself how much she wanted to see manifest, to feel—real and tangible—in her heart and hands, but she soon broke the kiss, and it left her winded. 

There was a very real possibility that she might have to wake up from this someday, she realized. Though that day may not be today, it was an inevitability she wasn’t ready to face. Especially not when she kept giving pieces of herself away so easily. 

Her thoughts ground to a halt when sudden footsteps stormed into the little alcove where they stood, too fast to give them time to hide the blush across their faces. 

“Oh my god, were you guys _kissing_?” The last word was uttered in a harsh whisper, adding to the scandalized tone in the interloper’s voice. 

Nico groaned, threw a glance at the dazed look on Karolina’s face, and turned to greet the voice with an embarrassed smile. “Hey Molly. You’ve met Karolina.” 

Molly slapped a hand over her mouth. “You were kissing Karolina Dean,” she continued to whisper. “Oh my god, I mean—I knew—obviously, intellectually I knew, but…it’s…it’s real. You were kissing Karolina, Nico.”

“Uh, maybe?”

“You were! I saw you. Oh my god, Nico!” 

“Okay, fine, yes. We might’ve been…doing that,” Nico huffed, rolling her eyes, “but let’s not make it a big deal—and why are we whispering?” 

Karolina cleared her throat. “I would also appreciate it if this was…not made a big deal. You wouldn’t want this kind of rumour to get out…especially before there’s an official statement. Confirmation.” Nico looked up just in time to catch Karolina’s smile, and her heart squeezed. 

“Okay, but if I’m supposed to keep this kissing business a secret, you guys will have to be a lot less obvious,” Molly huffed. 

“I think Gert already suspects something. I mean, you told her about the date. Thank you very much for that, by the way.”

Molly crossed her arms and held a finger in the air, fighting words armed and ready to defend herself when Karolina cut in. “Molly, why don’t you introduce me to your friends? I promise I will try to keep my hands to myself so nobody gets suspicious,” Karolina said with her sweet, made-for-the-silver-screen smile. She turned to give Nico a little wink, then ushered Molly into the living room before she could say anything else. 

Nico stood alone in the middle of the entrance, her cheeks burning as she clapped a hand to her eyes, wondering whether she should laugh or cry. And whether she would ever go back to her old life again. 

“So, you’re Nico’s friend, huh? I have to say, I haven’t heard very much about you, but our girl’s never been very forthcoming. It’s very nice to meet you,” Nico heard Livvie say as she entered the living room. She was perched on the armrest of her grey couch, smiling politely as she shook Karolina’s hand. Molly was just off to the side, trying unsuccessfully to suppress a grin. “Has anybody told you that you look just like that girl from the _Helix_ movies? Or was it _Stevie’s Seraphs_? One of those action franchises. My god, I’m totally blanking on her name. Was it Carol? Katie? Catherine? I’m pretty sure it starts with a ‘C’—god, who is it?”

“Karolina Dean?” Molly supplied helpfully. 

Livvie snapped a finger and pointed it in Molly’s direction. “Yes! That’s the one! You look just like her! But I bet you get that one a lot.” 

“Yes,” Karolina laughed. “I guess you can say that.”

Nico bit down a smile as she approached. She shoved her hands in her pockets, fighting the strange, sudden urge to stand close and wrap a hand around Karolina’s waist. “Hey, Liv. I see you’ve met Karolina.”

“Oh hey, Nico, there you are. I was just talking to your friend. Doesn’t she look so much like—wait, did you say her name is—hold up.” Livvie waved a hand, reclining back with such force that she nearly fell backwards onto the couch. “You don’t mean—”

Karolina bit back a smile, the amusement sparkling in her eyes. “I’m sorry—I probably should’ve said something earlier. I’m Karolina Dean. It’s very nice to meet you.” 

“You’ve got to be shitting me!” Livvie exclaimed. “Sorry, I—but—what—you’re—you’re Karolina Dean? Like the Karolina Dean? And you’re in my apartment. And you’re Nico’s friend? I’m just—excuse me, what? Nico thought Leonardo DiCaprio was a perfume!” 

“Can all of you guys just let that go?” Nico groaned. 

“Trust me, it’s my privilege to be here,” Karolina said with a smile. 

“Yeah, no, don’t even—I’m trying very hard not to scream right now, so it’s definitely my privilege. God, if Nico had warned me—I hope you don’t mind that dinner’s pretty simple. Just steak and—oh god, you’re not vegetarian, are you?”

Karolina chuckled. “I’m vegan actually, but it’s totally fine.” 

Nico tried not to laugh at Livvie’s mortified expression. Okay, maybe she felt a little bad for her friend too. “I, uh, salad! We have salad! Uh, Postmates?” 

Karolina stepped forward and placed her hands on Livvie’s shoulders. “It’s fine,” she said gently. “I’m more than grateful for anything you have to offer me, so please don’t go out of your way to accommodate me. I’m really just happy to be here.” 

“Yeah, Liv, you’ve been working all day,” Nico chimed in. “It’s my fault for not warning—I’ll run out and grab something if it makes you feel better.” 

“Or you can make Chase do it because he’s been following me around since he got here,” Gert grumbled as she stomped in from the kitchen. 

Nico and Karolina exchanged a knowing look. 

Chase came in a few steps behind her, throwing his hands up in defence. “I was just doing a sweep! Also, I can’t go because I have to keep this place safe.”

“Chase,” Karolina sighed, shaking her head. 

“What?”

“Nothing. I’m sorry about him, Gert. He’s a good guy, just…a bit of a doofus sometimes.” 

“Yeah, can you, like, I don’t know, take his batteries out or something?” Gert fumed. “Or send him to a literal doghouse. I don’t care.”

“Maybe you could get one of those spray bottles and just give him a little spritz when he’s misbehaving,” Nico said nonchalantly. 

“Oh, maybe a time-out?” Livvie piped in. 

Chase opened his arms. “Guys, seriously? I’m right here!”

“And I need you to be literally anywhere but here right now,” Gert grumbled. 

“I’m really sorry about him,” Karolina said, cringing. “Again.”

Gert looked at her, studying her for a few moments. “Look, Ms. Dean—“

“Karolina. Please,” Karolina interjected. 

Gert nodded, cheeks flushed a little with embarrassment. “Karolina. You know, Reptile Factory, is, like, one of my favourite movies of all time. It has its problems, but your character—Dr. Colin—she’s a badass.”

“Yes,” she replied slowly, confusion clear. 

“So,” Gert shrugged, “be more like her and stop apologizing for the bad behaviour of other people.”

“Ah.” Karolina chuckled nervously, wanting, it seemed, to apologize again. Nico nudged her with an elbow in an attempt to comfort her. What she wanted to do was hold her hand and take her away from this awkward situation, but she settled instead for a nudge and a smile. 

“Hey, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, Gert,” Chase said sheepishly. “You just seem cool, and I wanted to get to know you.”

“It’s…fine,” Gert mumbled, “just… boundaries.”

The tension and the conversation was soon cut short by the rattling of keys to the front door and doorsteps into the entryway. “Hey, guys! Thanks for using the shoe rack,” came a muffled new voice from behind the wall. “Guess all that nagging worked out after all.” 

“Welcome back! Dinner’s about ready, Alex,” Livvie called. To the rest of the group, she added, “I’m going to go grab the food and freak out by myself in the kitchen over there. You guys take a seat.” 

Nico seated herself between Karolina and Chase, opposite the empty chair which Alex soon occupied. “Hey guys,” Alex greeted again, unzipping his hoodie as he took a seat. “It’s nice to see some new faces too. Nico’s friends, right? I’m Alex. Nice to meet you.” He picked up a roll from a platter at the centre of the table and tore it in half. “Hope you don’t mind me digging in—I’m starving.”

“Hello,” Karolina replied, extending a shiny gold bag filled with pink tissue paper toward him. “Happy birthday, Alex. Just a little something from me and Chase for crashing your party. I wasn’t sure the no-presents rule applied to strangers.”

“Oh!” Alex nervously looked to Nico, who simply shrugged, before taking the bag. “You didn’t have to,” he said, peering inside. 

“I…didn’t really know what to get. Nico said you like computers and gadgets, but that kind of stuff just goes over my head, so I let Chase take the lead on this one.”

Alex pulled the box out slowly. “A…video card? Woah, these are like over a thousand dollars. I mean, I don’t even think these are on the shelves yet,” he cried, shoving the box back into the bag like it was going to explode. “I can’t take this. It’s too much.”

“It’s alright,” Chase said with a grin. “My buddy, Victor, and I just put together a sick gaming PC a little while ago. This one is awesome.” 

Reluctantly, Alex pulled the bag closer. “Yeah, I read about these…fastest 4K graphics card not yet on the market. It’s…man, I might have to get a new monitor.” 

“I have a couple I can recommend, if you like. Or you can wait until your next birthday,” Chase said with a wink. 

Karolina glanced at Nico, who caught her eye with a small smile and her cheeks tinted pink. Nico warmed at the smile Karolina returned. Even more so when she felt a hand on top of hers on her thigh. Their fingers interlocked, squeezing gently. Next year, Nico thought. That was a nice thought. 

No, she shouldn’t go there. 

Across the table beside Alex, Molly sent a swift kick to Nico’s shin, breaking them apart and earning Molly a glare. 

What the fuck? Nico mouthed. 

Molly mouthed back, stretching and pulling her entire mouth as dramatically as she could for clarity: Stop. Being. Obvious.

Nico scanned the room. Alex was deeply engrossed in conversation with Chase. Karolina was doing a perfect job of pretending to listen, while Gert was scrolling through her phone. She shouldn’t feel guilty or giddy, but there was something thrilling about all of this. Like kissing Karolina Dean was the greatest secret in the world. 

A secret she wouldn’t mind repeating again and again. Even if it was a secret most people in this room knew. What they could never know, of course, was the exquisite taste of her mouth, and how fast her heart raced whenever they came close. How much potential each look, smile, and touch seemed to contain. 

“So what do you guys do?” 

Nico was thrown suddenly out of her reverie so fast she could feel the dizziness of vertigo come on. Her gaze snapped up at Alex, suddenly wide awake and helplessly waiting for the air to return to her room. 

Gert and Molly looked over with interest. Karolina’s hand reached for Nico’s again. Alex, none the wiser, chewed happily at the lightly buttered roll in his hand. 

Chase glanced over at Karolina, who tipped her head so he would respond first. “Uh, for a living?” he said, “I guess you can say that I’m in, uh, private security?” 

“Oh, cool, like a bodyguard, or something?” 

“Yeah something like that.” 

“You too, Karolina?” Alex asked. He cocked his head and squinted his eyes as if trying to imagine a uniform on her. Nico glared across the table, and earned herself only a small furrow of his brows. 

“Oh, no. I’m an actress,” Karolina said with a polite smile. 

“Really?” Alex let out a breath. “Must be hard work out here in L.A. Do you do it full-time, or…” 

Karolina chuckled, clearly amused. “Yeah, pretty full-time.” 

“That’s really amazing,” Alex said. “I mean, I think you need a certain amount of grit to last out here in this industry. Are you in film or theatre?” 

“Mostly film,” Karolina replied. “Though I’ve thought about theatre on occasion. I admire the commitment and the artistry.” 

“It must be even more competitive in film, right? I hear you’d have to do a lot of extra work?” 

Molly and Gert, who had been quietly listening to this slow train wreck of a conversation, finally looked at each other and burst into laughter. “What?” Alex asked.

“Dude, you just asked Karolina Dean if she’s an extra,” Gert snickered, brushing a tear from the corner of her eye. 

“K-Karo—hold on, what? No way. No—wait, everyone knew except me?” He surveyed the grins all around him, and threw his half-eaten piece of bread onto his plate. “Why didn’t you say anything? You guys are such assholes!” He straightened his back to mask how much his hands and voice were shaking. “I’m really sorry, Ms. Dean, I had no idea.”

“And you loved the first _Helix_ movie too,” Livvie said, rolling her eyes as she came in with the a big bowl of salad.

“Didn’t you used to have a poster of Karolina?” Gert added. 

Alex buried his face in his hands. “Dude! Why are you making me sound so creepy?” He raised his hands defensively, swallowing visibly as he spared an anxious glance at Karolina. “It was, like, a gift from the theatre…like, on opening night. I swear!” 

“It’s okay, Alex,” Karolina said, shrugging one shoulder. “The costume designer for that film was really something else. You know, they made us all work out six days a week for that film. Good times. A lot of tears. But everyone looked hot and could kick ass in latex, and that’s all that mattered.”

“I need to watch this movie,” Nico mumbled absently. Several pairs of eyes immediately stared. “W-what? I’m just saying.”

Karolina bit down a grin, her cheeks pinking to match Nico’s. 

“Seriously, Nico?” Gert said, rolling her eyes while Chase just laughed. 

“You guys are unbelievable,” Molly said, shaking her head. 

“Am I missing something?”

Alex and Livvie exchanged a look. “Yeah, you and me both.”

That first round of laughter would lead to many more over the course of the night. It seemed almost too easy for Karolina to fit into Nico’s most comfortable spaces, in spite of the little reminders that this woman was extraordinary. (From her friends’ endless curiosity to the moment they’d opened the door to find one of Victor’s staff, a man in an impeccably ironed suit, with a case full of Karolina-friendly snacks and treats for the party. Delicate hors d’ouevres, pastries and champagne, enough for fifteen or more. Karolina was mortified that Victor had been so overzealous when she’d requested leftovers from the night before, hiding behind Nico with bumbling explanations when everyone else had their jaws on the floor.) And it was these little quirks—easily embarrassed and so self-consciously aware of her own extraordinariness—that made her so much more. 

This woman, the universe told Nico, could run away with her heart.   
  


* * *

  
“Thanks for coming tonight,” Nico said as they walked down the street side by side. She touched her hand when she spoke, an uncharacteristically intimate gesture she instinctively made—not for the first time—before her brain could protest. Karolina turned to her with a smile, one that made her feel like she owned the world, then laced their fingers together. “And sorry about Gert. She can be a bit blunt.”

“It was my pleasure.” Karolina chuckled. “And please, you’re starting to sound like me. Stop apologizing. I had a really great time. Really great.”

Nico ducked her head slightly to hide her smile. “Okay.”

It was almost midnight, and there were only the sound of their footsteps and the slight ringing in their ears to fill the silence of the cool, night air. “You…didn’t have to walk me all the way home. It’s not exactly close.” 

Karolina swung their clasped hands slightly. “Now that I think about it, I’m pretty committed to my morning runs, but I can’t remember the last time I walked anywhere. A forty minute walk at that. So, this is a treat for me, really. This whole night has been a treat.” 

Nico laughed. “Really? Aren’t you tired? I was socialed out like three hours ago.” 

“Oh, me too. I’m exhausted,” Karolina said, bumping Nico lightly on the shoulder. “I’ve been running on empty for the last few hours, but…being with you is different. I feel like I don’t have to pretend to be anybody I’m not, and…that’s…really special, you know?” 

The butterflies in Nico’s stomach squirmed uncomfortably. 

“I’m really not that special, you know. And probably not as nice as you seem to think I am,” Nico replied quietly. 

“The important thing is that you were really nice to me and you didn’t even know who I was. Surely, that’s something?” 

Nico stopped. “What if I was just nice that time because I thought you were hot?” She asked with a smirk. 

Karolina glanced at their intertwined hands bridging the distance between them. “What if I was being a terrible guest and an annoying weirdo because I thought you were hot?” She returned with a lopsided smile. 

“Guess it worked out then.” 

Karolina reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind Nico’s ear. Her hand was a little cold against her cheek, and Nico wondered if she should warm it up with her own. 

It was the perfect night. The most perfect Nico could remember in a very long time. Perhaps it was Karolina’s easy smile and lighthearted banter. Perhaps it was the life in her eyes whenever she pulled her own hair behind her ear and laughed. Or the tentative—dare she say affectionate— glances whenever silence fell between them. 

She could get used to this, she thought with a smile. She could really fall in love with this girl. Her smile slipped when the thought poured over her like a bucket of ice-cold water over her head. She felt her heart in her throat, thrashing wildly, begging her to shove those words away as far as possible. No, she refused to go there. She refused to think about the pain that would inevitably follow if she handed her the keys to her sanctuary. She refused to picture the torch she was sliding into Karolina’s hand—one that could set it all on fire: her peace, her dreams, her future. Her. 

No, not on a perfect night like this. 

She liked Karolina’s company. That’s all it was. 

“Oh.”

Karolina’s smile fell. “What is it, Nico?”

“I know this place.”

Nico paused at a wrought-iron gate, covered in lichen and rust. A sudden memory struck her. It was a particularly drunken night with her friends: the night she signed the paperwork for her bookstore. They’d been elated, hopeful, and starry-eyed at the possibilities, singing and dancing down the street. That night, clambering over this very fence—they felt like they could do anything. 

It was a night so much like this one. 

Before she could stop herself, she pulled Karolina to a stop and pushed one foot into one of the iron loops in the gate. 

“Nico? What…are you doing?”

Nico flashed a grin. “C’mon,” she said with a tilt of her head. In a flash, she scampered up the side and feeling the rush of her heart to her head as she fell, landed on the other side with a soft thump. Karolina grasped the bars with both hands, bewildered. “C’mon,” she repeated softly as she reached out to brush Karolina’s knuckle lightly with her thumb. 

“Is this private property?” Karolina whispered nervously. 

“I’m not sure,” Nico mumbled. “It should be okay.” She took a few steps backwards, away from the gate, and beckoned her once more. Karolina looked around, and it was only when Nico shuffled a few more steps back that Karolina shakily stuck her shoe into the iron loop, just as Nico had done. 

“W-wait for me,” she called out quietly. 

Nico chuckled, then approached the gate with her arms open. “Don’t worry,” she said. “I’ll catch you if you fall.” 

Karolina looked down sceptically from the top of the gate. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re...pretty small, Nico.” 

Nico scoffed. “I’m tougher than I look, you know.” 

Karolina tried to smile, but as she swung one wobbly leg over to straddle the gate, she didn’t feel particularly reassured. 

Below, Nico kept her arms up, trying not to gawk. It was hard not to find her long legs and moonlit hair enticing despite Karolina’s pale expression and shrunken form. “That’s it,” she encouraged. The other leg soon made it to the other side. 

“I’m…I’m not jumping into your arms,” Karolina said, slinking down the side like a worm on a hook. 

“Suit yourself,” Nico said. She dropped her arms and watched Karolina struggle her way back to solid ground. “Would’ve been faster if you did.” 

Finally, Karolina swept a long lock of hair out of her face and breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m not having one of those movie moments where I crush you and accidentally kiss you at the same time.” When she caught her breath, she straightened up and slipped her hand back into Nico’s. 

“We’ve already kissed a couple of times. What’s the harm?” 

“Well, yes, but,” Karolina mumbled shyly, “it looks painful. And there’s probably easier ways to convince you to kiss me…”

“Like stealing my sweater and holding it hostage?” Nico laughed. She pulled them across the perfectly manicured lawn, and into a larger park, lined with trees and colourful patches of flowers. 

They were at the foot of a slight hill when Karolina pulled Nico close and pressed a brief kiss to her lips, surprising her enough to let out a small squeak. Karolina giggled. “You are adorable.” 

“You… you don’t play fair,” Nico mumbled. 

Karolina shrugged, looking a little sheepish when her eyes fell to the grass. 

Nico, standing tightly within her space, leaned against Karolina’s taller form and kissed her one more time, tugging her gently up the hill as she did so. The heat sparked, both sides coming in at full force, and it was only when she felt cool metal against her back that they broke apart. Nico peered back at the bench behind her, then sat down, laughing when Karolina nearly fell over in the sudden absence of her lips. She stuck an arm out and caught herself on the backrest just in time

“You don’t play fair,” Karolina pouted, sliding into the seat beside Nico. Slowly, she relaxed her arm and laid it across the well-worn wood of the backrest. Her finger gently twirled a loose strand of Nico’s hair, and they sat there for a while, quietly soaking in the starlight in each other’s eyes. “I feel like we’ve escaped into another world,” Karolina whispered wistfully. “Like I’m allowed to just…be. Like I’m just a girl sitting next to a girl, wishing she could sit here forever. Side-by-side.”

Nico smiled, leaned into her touch when her finger brushed her cheek. “That would be nice. I really love this place.”

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah, we just found this little piece of paradise recently, but I’ve…always loved this neighbourhood ever since I moved here.” 

Karolina tilted her head. “Tell me.”

“Not much to tell,” she replied with a shrug. “Controlling parents, rebelling by running off to L.A. to open an occult bookstore. Wherever the parents aren’t, wherever I can peacefully be myself—that’s my paradise. Typical American story, no?” 

“One version of it, yes,” Karolina chuckled. “What made you leave?”

“I think I just woke up one day and realized that the proudest they’ve ever been was when they thought I was going to marry Alex someday. Something about having a wealthy childhood friend like we’re in some Victorian romance novel. People like that…it’s just better with a little bit of distance.”

“I had the impression you were quite close with your dad.”

“He’s alright. Better now that he and my mom no longer live in the same city.”

“Ah…I see.” Karolina shook her head sadly. “Maybe we’re in the same boat. Divorced, emotionally unavailable parents. Enough childhood scars to burn anybody who comes close. Spending way too much time wondering if we’d end up just like them. Oh, and growing up with Britney Spears’ ‘Lucky’ on constant repeat with mascara running down your face, obviously.”

Nico rolled her eyes lightly despite the way butterflies seemed to fill her entire being. “Yeah, I get that it’s really cute to match, but let’s not gush over matching baggage. Well, almost. I mean, Britney Spears? I would never…admit it out loud.”

Karolina laughed, lazily twirling a loose strand of Nico’s hair around her finger. “Alright, then…we can talk about...you and Alex. I wouldn’t have guessed.” 

“Ew,” Nico said, almost reflexively. “Ancient history. We were so young and awkward, you’d barely call it dating now. Plus, he’s been eternally doomed to be in love with a woman who will always be too good for him. Ask me something else.”

Karolina furrowed her brows and hummed, pretending to think for a long moment. 

“Can I kiss you again?” 

Nico felt her cheeks warm and heard her words fail inside her head. 

“It’s…more embarrassing when you ask, you know,” Nico replied, dropping her eyes to realize her hand had found its way onto Karolina’s thigh this entire time. 

When they kissed again, it was as if, for the first time in their lives, time was on their side. Nothing else existed but the two of them, stripped down to their most basic parts, bound together in ways neither could explain. Nico felt it again when she wrapped her arms around Karolina’s neck. She felt it deep in her belly, like she was the master of the universe. Like they could do anything. 

The moon hung high above them. 

And Nico could not remember feeling so content. 

“Nico,” Karolina mumbled breathlessly, pulling away slowly, almost painfully. “We…we shouldn’t get too carried away.” 

“Huh?” Nico blinked, dazed. 

“You know…a lot of these benches are dedicated to husbands and wives, couples who once sat here after entire lifetimes together. Don’t you find that so beautiful?” Karolina said, leaning her head against Nico’s as she gazed up at the sky. 

Nico, whose mind was still preoccupied with Karolina’s lips and the patterns she was currently drawing on her thigh, took a few long moments to unsuccessfully allow the words to marinate. 

She tried to think of an intelligent answer, but eventually had to settle on “What?”

Karolina’s gentle laughter was all warm vibrations against Nico. “I’m just saying…this is a special place…where people fall in love and stay together for a long time. A lifetime. Maybe even multiple lifetimes. It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“It can be,” Nico replied. “But two people can also stay together and be stupendously unhappy.” 

“That’s true. But don’t you wonder whether the happy ones are the rule or the exception? I like to think happiness is the rule. I mean, you give up so much to love—surely it has to count for something.”

“Maybe. I wouldn’t know.”

Karolina lifted her head and captured Nico’s eyes with a gaze so intimate, so intense, so impossibly vulnerable that Nico saw the words before she heard them. 

Five simple words that shivered with promise. 

“I’d like to find out.” 

“Me too.” 

But in the safety of their Eden, it was easier to be so hopeful. To make secret promises to themselves and to each other. To whisper sweet nothings and believe them to be everything. Easier, perhaps, to believe this was the beginning of their fairy tale.

But eventually, they had to leave the safety of the garden. Eventually, the realities of their two worlds would hit them. 

Of course, neither thought it would slap them backhand across their faces so soon. 

The sky was getting a little brighter as they slowly continued along the quiet road. Ten minutes away from Nico’s apartment now, and Nico, still oblivious to the wheels of fate, could not stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss Karolina again on the front steps. To invite her in, offer her a drink. To sit her down on the couch and languidly explore her soft mouth. An exploration that could lead to more. 

The night felt suddenly very warm. 

As they drew closer and closer, she quickly added up a list of excuses to extend the night until morning, nervously navigating that fine line between being too bold and regretting not being bold enough. She glanced down at their interlocked hands—she just wasn’t quite ready to let go yet, no matter what happened. Was she?

“Karolina?” Nico said, stopping once more. 

Karolina cupped her cheek, her eyes glittering with starlight. “Yes? What is it?” She asked, smiling as if they were the last two people on earth and nothing else mattered. As if their hearts beat in perfect rhythm and the world allowed them to just be. 

“I had a really good time tonight.” 

“Me too.” 

Karolina brushed her cheek with the pad of her thumb, moving in slightly for a kiss. They’d shared so many by now that Nico had lost count. She closed her eyes. 

And waited. 

And waited. 

Her eyes blinked open. Karolina stared at her blankly, pale and frozen. She wasn’t smiling. 

“Did you hear that?” Karolina whispered. 

Nico looked around, but the streets were as still as they had ever been. “What? I didn’t hear anything.”

But Karolina was pale, as if she’d seen a ghost. 

She whipped around, her gaze laser-focused on the shrubbery that lined the streets. She let go of Nico’s face and hand as if she suddenly spouted fire. 

“What’s wrong?” Nico whispered uneasily. Her stomach twisted with dread. 

“Christ, how could I have been so stupid?” Karolina mumbled as she paced a few steps back toward the way they came. “God forbid I have one good night.” 

“Karolina, what’s wrong?” Nico followed, reaching for her arm, but Karolina pulled it back and held it to her heart, her eyes finding Nico for only a moment—too fast for her to see what they contained—before looking away. 

“I’m sorry, Nico. We—I…I was careless.” 

Nico shoved her hands into her coat pocket, her patience disappearing when she felt the emptiness between her fingers. “Okay? That doesn’t answer my question,” she snapped. 

“Someone took a photo of us just now, Nico!” Karolina snapped back, throwing her hands in the air. “Do you have any idea what’s going to happen tomorrow?” 

“We weren’t even doing anything!”

“We were holding hands! I was—I was about to kiss you.” Karolina took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and seemed to pull something out of the air with her hands to replenish some sense of calm. “Look, Nico,” she said quietly, “you don’t know what it’s like to be bulldozed by the press. And having to do whatever it takes to claw back some sense of yourself—some…part of your story—that you can still control. If rumours start getting out… if people start thinking there is even a chance that you…you could be”—she dropped her eyes, her cheeks tinged in spite of the unexpected heat rising out of her—“mine.” She cleared her throat. “They’ll find you and they’ll dig up everything about you and…and I don’t want you to hate me, Nico, but I think you will if you step into my world.” 

Nico tentatively reached out and touched her shoulder. “I…”

“You don’t deserve this kind of life, Nico. You’re…you’re too good.”

She knew she had to say something, but she didn’t know what. If everything she said was true, it was goodbye to her peaceful little life. Goodbye to the simple things. Goodbye to a life she worked so hard to build. For a woman she barely knew.

But that wasn’t quite true, was it? They had a connection. They had something worth fighting for, didn’t they? Because above it all, she didn’t know if she could say goodbye to—

“I should go,” Karolina said quickly. A slow, sad smile spread across her lips. “I think…maybe this was a mistake. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. I—we shouldn’t see each other anymore—I... Goodbye, Nico.”

Karolina. 

Her words echoed—her message loud and clear in the absence of all other sounds— long after she found herself shivering alone on the street. Long after the sun began to rise and she found herself awake in bed, her whole body heavy yet empty as she stared up at the ceiling. 

A mistake. She was a mistake. 

The worst part was that despite the fact that they never should’ve kissed in the first place, she couldn’t bring herself to regret a single thing. 

Not yet. Not while she could still recall the subtle scent of Karolina’s clothes. 

She couldn’t regret a thing even if, as the night replayed itself over and over like a broken movie in her head, it hurt more than she could admit. 

Even if she spent all night telling herself not to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! This was by far my favourite chapter to write, and even then I almost did not include the scene on the bench in Notting Hill had I not been reminded (thank you for that). 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who is still reading in spite of how quiet the fandom is. Hope everyone is staying safe and sane in this wild world. I will see you all in the next update.
> 
> P.S. How would you guys feel about an epilogue?


	4. Chapter 4

Nico Minoru was decidedly not a morning person. Despite years of routinely waking up early in the morning, whether it was opening up her store or—in her past life—sparring with her dad in the kickboxing ring, she still felt no less fury whenever she was woken up. Especially when it was her phone and not her alarm clock practically vibrating off the end table. And especially, especially, after a sleepless night of thinking about all the ways she’d hoped to wake up this morning, and all the reasons why everything sucked. 

With a grunt, she rolled over and grabbed her phone with half a mind to smash it. Then she saw the first message on a stack of many: “is this u???” 

Her heart seemed to drop right through her stomach as she quickly unlocked her phone. Above the words, Molly had sent a picture. It was dim and slightly blurry, taken by a cell phone, partially obscured by shrubbery. Karolina’s face was clear—she was smiling all the way up to her eyes. 

There she was, clear as day. Her back was mostly turned toward the camera, her profile obscured by Karolina’s hand in her hair. 

It wasn’t anything close to scandalous or even revealing. Nico breathed a sigh of relief, but it was surreal nonetheless to see herself in a photo she did not take. Even if nobody could see who she was. 

Her thumb absently touched Karolina’s face—it really was a perfect night up until this moment. 

The relief was short-lived, unfortunately, when all of her other notifications pointed her in the direction of a worldwide manhunt for her. Her. A nobody who simply had the misfortune of having Karolina Dean steal her sweater. And the fortune, she supposed, for having held Karolina’s hand. 

The Internet was riveted. Hashtags were trending. Everyone wanted to know: who was the woman who captured the elusive heart of Karolina Dean? She began to put her phone down, unsure what else to do while reeling from blustery confusion of it all. 

A new message managed to shake her out of a stupor she’d found herself in, but the day seemed to get even stranger. And she hadn’t even left her own bed yet. 

It was from a number she did not recognize. 

_Don’t go outside – K._

A bit dramatic, Karrie, don’t you think? Nico thought as her fingers hovered over her keyboard. And where the hell did you get my number? She shook her head and shoved back the nickname her exhausted mind had pushed to the surface. 

There were so many questions that she hardly knew where to begin. “What the hell is going on?” she typed in lieu of everything else. 

_It will blow over._

The only thing more ominous than Karolina’s message seemed to be the many posts under #FindDeansGirl that Molly had sent. She stomached only a quick scroll, finding several well-wishers among a mountain of heated fans, and tossed her phone on the bed like it was on fire. 

Visions of an angry mob blowing through her doors and burning her books immediately flashed through her mind. She felt something pinch her deep in the stomach and she wanted to throw up. 

Relax, she told herself in spite of the bile threatening to crawl up her throat. You’re just being dramatic. The photo showed nothing. 

When she finally went downstairs, Molly was already waiting with breakfast. She was bouncing on the balls of her feet, and it was clear she wasn’t going to waste a moment on preamble. “Oh my god, Nico, like everyone is talking about you,” she said, gesturing excitedly. “I mean, not you, you, but the idea of you, y’know? People are so curious about who you are and how you managed to steal Karolina Dean’s heart. You’re basically a celebrity now, Nico. A secret celebrity. Ooh! Like Banksy!” 

“Except my only talent is, according to karolinadream246, throwing myself all over the rich and famous for attention and breaking Julie’s heart,” Nico replied with a frown. “I don’t even know a Julie.”

“Ew, ignore those. You probably don’t realize this because you’re so comfortable living under a rock, but Karolina has, like, a lot of fans.”

“Yeah, I noticed, thank you very much,” she snapped.

“Look, there are millions of people out there who would love to take your place, and they’re just saying things because they don’t know who you are yet, but you’ve taken something from them.” Molly added the last thought with a frown of her own, as if the words had taken shape without her realizing. “Oof. Nico, what are you going to do now?”

Nico rubbed a hand down her face—she had been in such a whirlwind this morning that she hadn’t even put on makeup. “Nothing,” she said with a sigh. “Everyone is just blowing this out of proportion. Karolina and I…we’ve seen each other a few times. It hardly means anything. I mean, look at these texts.” She handed her phone to Molly to show her the two lines Karolina had sent earlier in the day. 

“Okay?” Molly mumbled. “But I don’t get what this has to do with anything?”

“Obviously, she’s concerned about this whole thing. Not good for PR probably. She’s probably—I don’t know—fighting off reporters as we speak.” She took a step back and leaned her head against the wall. “It doesn’t matter, Molly. A couple dates and a few laughs—none of that matters. We were never going to work out anyway.” 

For a long moment, Molly said nothing. Then, she tapped a few things into Nico’s phone and handed it back to her. “Did you see the look on Karolina’s face in this picture?” 

Nico’s heart softened. “Yeah, she’s smiling,” she said reverently, as if to herself. 

“That look on her face is all anybody is talking about. Well, other than who she’s looking at. Popular theory is that you’re Julie Powers, who I’ve never heard of but it sounds insane. I mean, I don’t think she’s Asian? Not that you can tell from the photo, I guess.” Molly shook her head quickly to refocus her attention. “Point is, I think…she really likes you, Nico. Like, even here, you guys can’t stop being so obvious!”

Nico locked her phone and stared at the black screen for a while. “Maybe,” she said. “It doesn’t matter now. There’s no point in looking at this stuff.”

She was a mistake. 

“But I saw you guys yesterday. In the hallway and—and throughout the night. You were so happy.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Nico grounded out, louder this time. 

“But what if it does, Nico?” Molly practically shouted impatiently. “It could.” 

“No,” Nico snapped, clenching her fist tightly around her phone. “It couldn’t. Now drop it, Mols. Just fucking drop it. Forever.”

With a sigh, Molly put her palms up and resigned. “I don’t know what happened between you two, but I am not fighting you on an empty stomach,” she said. Dejectedly, she shoved her hand into the paper bag she brought and pulled out a foil-wrapped breakfast burrito. 

“Good,” Nico replied curtly. 

So, why did she wish she would?   
  


* * *

Almost a week later, Nico continued to do as she was told and stayed inside. Molly came to help out and delivered groceries from her parents’ farm. “It’s time you start doing a bit more cooking anyway,” she’d declared when Nico had declined the gifts. 

There was, really, nowhere she’d rather be. With nobody she wanted to talk to, she’d kept her phone in her desk and let the battery die. Lately, even the chocolate stash tasted like cardboard. Though she made a mental note to check the expiry date before eating them, she couldn’t seem to remember to care. About anything, really. She tried to recall whether the world always seemed so…colourless. Despite everything, she mostly found herself spending every other minute hoping Karolina was okay. She hoped that Victor was feeding her well, that Chase kept her safe, and that she didn’t feel as alone as she did. 

Nico picked up a piece of pink paper and folded it over. She shook her head to rid herself of the worry. It wasn’t her place to worry. 

It was a quiet day in the store, like every day, and she deftly folded up a little origami crane to join the rest of the flock. A few of them had started separate colonies off her desk and on the floor, but she ignored them. 

She was focused—trying to imagine what it would be like to be carried away by a flock of cranes and not to wonder what Karolina was doing in any given moment—when a sudden knock on her doorframe surprised the half-folded crane out of her hands with a curse, and she was greeted with a familiar laugh. 

“What the hell, dude?” Nico mumbled as she picked the crane up from the ground. She resumed her task, not bothering to look up at the intruder. “What do you want, Gert?” 

“Jesus, Sadako, what is happening in here? Are you trying to make a wish?” 

“ _Who_? And yes,” Nico replied with a scoff. “My wish would be for you to go away.” 

Gert, however, only pushed aside a group of cranes to lean on the corner of her desk. “So rude. Even though I have a gift for you.” 

Nico looked up at the brown paper bag in her lap, skeptical. “Why?” 

“Obviously because you’ve been such a bundle of joy lately,” Gert replies drily. 

“Fuck off.” 

“Jesus, will you chill? It’s from Karolina.” 

Nico’s froze. 

“Okay, why do you look like you just saw a ghost?” Gert said, narrowing her eyes. “I thought you’d be happy? Aren’t you guys, like, the internet’s happiest couple now?”

“Why are you giving this to me?” Nico demanded. 

“Uh, wouldn’t it be too obvious if she came herself? People are still looking for you, you know.” 

“But how? How did you get it?” 

Unexpectedly, Gert blushed. “Chase gave it to me. Karolina asked him, but he’s been busy with…everything.” 

Nico fiddled with the wings of the crane in her hand. “Well,” she said slowly, “I’m happy for you. Chase is a good guy.” 

“What? We’re just—I mean, we’re not—wait,” Gert frowned. “Nico…is everything okay?” 

Nico eyed the brown bag warily. “Can you…can you just leave the bag at the till or something? I might actually cry if I see what’s inside.” 

“Cry?” Gert frowned. “Nico, did Karolina say something to you?” 

“It’s just a figure of speech,” Nico replied lamely. Rightly, Gert did not look convinced. “Look, Gert,” she opened her hands, imploring her to believe what she was about to say—maybe then she’d be able to convince herself—“we’ve been on, like, two dates and everyone is making a big deal out of us. We all knew this had to end at some point. I mean, Jesus, we barely began. Better now than later, when we’re all invested and shit, right? Nothing like a little online celebrity to welcome a good dose of reality.” 

“Oh my god. I get it—this makes so much sense. I don’t know why I didn’t see it before—must be losing it. Both you and Karolina are acting like you’ve been possessed by lonely elderly women—you know Chase said she knitted like a sweater and two scarves since the birthday party? It all makes sense now.” 

“Okay? Cool, thank you so much for your contribution, Gertrude.”

“I’m just going to ignore that very snide tone because you clearly have a problem,” she said, gesturing emphatically to the cranes on her desk. In a softer voice, she added, “Tell me what happened, Nico. I’m sorry—I’ve been so distracted by this thing with Chase I didn’t even notice…”

“It’s fine.” Nico shrugged, her eyes on the fresh piece of paper she was currently folding. “It’s not a big deal,” she said, trying to keep the tremble out of her voice. “That bag—you brought back the sweater she took from me, so it’s over. Officially. Simple as that.” 

Gert placed the bag on the desk and watched her work for a moment before speaking. “You know, I’ve seen you a lot less upset after ending way longer relationships.”

“I’m not upset.” 

“That’s not what this is telling me,” she said, drawing a circle around the cranes on Nico’s desk with a finger one more time. “It’s okay to be upset, you know. It’s been a long time since you allowed anybody in—I get it. But you did, and I’m proud of you.” 

Nico rolled her eyes. “And look where that got me.” 

Gert bit her lip. “I saw a letter inside. Maybe you should read it first so you don’t jump to conclusions. Maybe it will have the answer, even if it might not be the answer you want to hear right now.”

Nico felt sick. 

“Hey,” Gert said, “no matter what happens, it’ll be okay. If you need me, I’m here.”

Gert gave Nico one last smile, then pushed herself off the desk and left her alone in her office with the bag and about four hundred cranes. With a heavy sigh, Nico put down the half-formed crane in her hand and reached for the paper bag. 

Her heart beat wildly, apprehensively, with a kind of terror she did not expect. Even if it was her dad’s sweater, she should be happy to get it back—to move on from these few strange weeks—right? So, why did she dread the sight of that blue sweater she used to love so much? 

She reached inside and her fingers brushed against soft fabric before pulling out a note. She then unfolded the lightly perfumed piece of paper and her eyes roamed ravenously over the neat, swirly handwriting. 

_Dear Nico,_

_I don’t know what to do. Every fiber of my being tells me I shouldn’t think about you, but I can’t seem to stop._

_I’m sorry for everything that happened that night, and the mess that followed. You see now that the people in my world can be unkind. I panicked, Nico, and I let that get the best of me. Maybe that makes me the most unkind of them all._

_I regret what I said that night. I regret even more that I let go. I don’t expect you to forgiv_ e _me when I don’t even know how to forgive myself. Just know that I like you very much, and I never meant to hurt you. I just wish I knew how to make it all better._

_Perhaps if we could’ve met in different circumstances, in a different time and a different world, this would all be easier._

_Though it breaks my heart, I can’t pretend I can just waltz into your world and fit myself into it, which is why I feel like I have no choice but to return your sweater._

_I wish you all the happiness in the world._

_Yours Sincerely,_

_Karolina_

Nico read the letter several more times, until a loud, “What?” escaped her lips in a puff of air. “Are you fucking kidding me?” followed in a whisper. 

She stood up, her cranes fallen to the side as she swept out of her office and into her store. Gert and Molly, who had been at the till speaking in low voices, turned immediately as she came in. 

Molly flashed a smile. “Hey—”

“What the hell is this?” Nico growled impatiently as she waved the note around. 

Her friends stared back blankly, baffled. “What are you talking about?” Gert asked with a furrow of her brows. “And why are you yelling?”

“This! Did you see this? Why—I don’t understand.” The anger that possessed her so suddenly only moments ago seemed to disappear all at once, replaced by an unfamiliar discomfort knotting up her stomach and a wave of overwhelming confusion. “This can’t be right. Did you—did Chase put her up to this?”

Gert snatched the stationary out of Nico’s hand and mouthed the words quickly as she read. “That’s…not what I expected,” Gert murmured. 

Molly, who had been eagerly reading over her sister’s shoulder, lifted her eyes off the page and looked at Nico. “I don’t get it,” she said simply. 

Nico scoffed. “Yeah, me neither. What the hell is the point of a fancy note if she didn’t want to see me again. I thought she was pretty clear the first time.” 

“No, I mean, I don’t get why you’re angry? Like, it seems nice,” Molly said, gesturing to the note Gert was rereading. “Doesn’t it? Like, really heartfelt and kinda romantic, I think.”

Gert hummed. “I’m with Molly, but Nico’s also has a point. Why send a letter now? I mean, if she didn’t care, isn’t the sweater enough? If she did care—which Chase seems convinced that she does—why send the sweater back with a note like this? This is basically a love letter.” 

“What? No, it’s not,” Nico protested, snatching the letter back. “She obviously doesn’t want to see me again, and I feel like she’s rubbing it in my face. I know we’re different—two different worlds and all that bullshit, but—this is just too much.” Sulkily, she folded the letter back up. 

“I disagree. There are more effective ways to say fuck you than sending love letters,” Gert said, a small smirk crossing her lips. 

“It’s not a love letter,” Nico insisted. Yet she unfolded the piece of paper once more and reread the words. “It’s not…right? That doesn’t make any sense.”

“Unless she wants you to prove her wrong.” Gert gasped as the epiphany hit her. “That’s it!”

“Oh my god,” Molly chimed in, slapping her sister’s arm excitedly. “She wants you to go after her, Nico!”

“What? Why?” Nico clutched the letter to her chest. “How?” 

Gert stepped forward and wrapped Nico in a brief, one-arm hug. “Clearly, you don’t want things to end like this either. You wouldn’t have been so angry if you did. So… maybe you should talk to her.”

Instead of shrugging off her arm like Gert had expected, she looked down at the limply clutched letter in both hands and said nothing. She hadn’t stopped yet to think about where the anger had come from. Molly was right—Karolina’s words really were sweet. Polite. Contrite. Almost romantic. She didn’t have any reason to be angry. Not really. 

She had been folding cranes for days, convinced that she’d disappeared from her life for good. To hear from her again… She should’ve been happy, should’ve found closure in that letter. Should’ve been able to move on and go back to her peaceful little life. 

And yet it was there, bubbling beneath the surface. The letter and the sweater, passed along through two messengers—surely the short time they spent together meant more than that? 

She wanted to crumple the letter up and throw it out the window. But she couldn’t, couldn’t even bring herself to wrinkle the paper because what the hell was wrong with her? 

Maybe Gert was right—they needed to talk before she slowly drove herself crazy. 

Nico’s eyes shot up from the letter and directly into Gert’s with a burning intensity her friend had not seen in years. 

“I need to talk to Chase.”

* * *

Several days after a lengthy conversation with Chase over the phone, Nico found herself in hell. 

One only needs to spend ten minutes with Nico Minoru to know that she did not particularly like people. She liked her friends well enough. She liked her family too, to an extent. But strangers? Oh god, the talking and the smiling and the pretending—it was just too much. 

And literally swarms of strangers, all trained to do exactly the things she hated? No, the fires of hell was an unimaginative eternal punishment compared to this: the “media circus,” as Chase called it. 

“They’re doing interviews for the movie that just premiered. Rainbow Space—could’ve had a better title, I know. Story isn’t bad though. Surprisingly touching. Here, put this on,” Chase had told her when they’d gotten out of the car. He threw his black jacket—SECURITY in bold white lettering across the back—and black baseball cap on her and laughed when both seemed to eat her up entirely. “I would’ve given you a press pass to help you blend in, but somehow, this baby playing dress up look is a lot more convincing. If this doesn’t make Karolina happy, I don’t know what will.”

Nico had scowled, mumbling for Chase to fuck right off as she rolled up her sleeves and adjusted the cap.

“Okay, but seriously, don’t forget that everything we’re doing is against the rules, and I’m really sticking my neck out for you, and it’s only because I really think you can make things right with her, so like, don’t talk to anyone, alright?”

And as she stood now at the edge of a ballroom filled with reporters, she realized Chase was absolutely right. She would not survive two seconds faking small talk with these professional bullshit detectors. 

She could barely survive breathing the same air as all of these people. The only thing keeping her alive was the thought of seeing Karolina again—a woman so magnetic, so irresistible, yet so complicated in her otherworldly throne that she had to row across the River Styx to get to her. 

The talent themselves, she learned with disappointment, were sequestered in individual rooms. Standing by the refreshment table looking as grim as she could, Nico simply watched helplessly watched as groups of reporters came and went. Standing around, and sweating underneath the oversized clothes and the oversized lies. 

To make matters worse, Chase was constantly disappearing and talking into his little microphone and actually working, leaving Nico completely alone and struggling to seem as unapproachable as possible. Perhaps this was a very bad idea, she thought glumly, looking away when one of the reporters seemed to be trying to make eye contact with her. 

When a confused-looking woman started moving toward her, she quickly and coolly strode into a hallway, where she found about fifteen seconds of peace before somebody slapped a hand on her shoulder. 

“There you are.” 

Panic crawled over her skin immediately. Before she could make a sound, however, a large hand came down on her cap and pushed it over her eyes. 

“Relax.” A familiar voice tittered above her mischievously. “It’s me.”

“Jesus, Chase, you scared me,” Nico mumbled, tugging her hat back up to level him with a glare. “I thought I would have to tell more lies.” 

“Shit, you didn’t talk to anybody, did you?” Chase asked with a grimace.

“No. Being here is my lie,” she huffed. “I’m not exactly an actor, you know. I’m not even a people person.”

“Wow. Really? But you hide it so well,” Chase deadpanned. When Nico glared up at him in response, he burst into laughter. “God, you’re funny.” He then cleared his throat and wiped the single tear from the corner of his eye with the pad of his thumb, before straightening up. He readjusted Nico’s cap—despite the playful smirk, it was back to business. “Follow me, keep your head down, and don’t say a word.”

Nico soon found herself in a small room filled with more vases of flowers than she’d ever seen in her life. At the centre of the room was a crystal chandelier, and below it was a red velvet seat with golden arms. On top of this seat, across from two reporters, sat Karolina, with her beautiful blonde waves and cascading white dress pouring over her long legs. Her eyes left the reporters for only a moment, to look up at the security team as they came in. It was just Chase and her, but if she noticed Nico, she gave no indication as she spoke, smoothly and confidently without missing a beat. 

From below the brim of her cap, Nico took her in. Her heart skipped a beat. She was so different, commanding control of the room with merely a look. And so gorgeous under that chandelier that it took her breath away. Everything from her posture to her hair to her lips—god, those lips—was in place. It was almost enough to sweep her off her feet, though she was merely…existing. Her heart’s dilemma was clear: her existence reminded Nico of all the things she missed, but her intrusion into this world so different from her own reminded Nico of the distance between them and all the obstacles that laid ahead. How vast that distance seemed just yesterday when she, in preparing for every worst case scenario, wondered if they could ever be in the same room again. 

And now that distance seemed further still. Nico was in awe of the shiny armour Karolina wore over her emotions. She had to squint to picture the woman she’d come to know—the woman who lit up the sky with her smile with a simple touch of her hand. The woman whom she missed more than she dared to admit. 

To think this ethereal goddess was the same woman who held her dad’s sweater hostage just to see her again. To think this composed, indomitable woman did not have the courage to say a proper goodbye. 

Nico swallowed the emotions that immediately rose. 

In her moment of distraction, she noticed an older woman watching the interviews from the corner of the room. She was glued to her phone, typing furiously with pursed lips. Even so, Nico tipped her cap a little lower, the fear of being caught gawking pushing her heart rate up to dangerous levels. 

And yet she could not—would not—look away. Karolina was so lively, so warm, so powerful, so enticing, and so…articulate. So different, yet so much the same beneath the surface, and her smile—Nico had seen enough of her favourite smile over the course of their two perfect nights to recognize it, and though this one was a near-perfect replica, it didn’t quite reach her eyes and it lasted far too long. Nico wondered what she was seeing, what she was feeling, what she must be thinking. 

Yes, she had a way of putting people at ease. Even from where Nico stood, it was easy to see that she had a kind of magic about her. Perhaps it was the same kind of magic that drew Nico in so hopelessly. And yet there was a world of quiet suffering beneath it. She wondered whether the two reporters saw it too. 

“I was surprised to see Miss Julie Powers make her cameo in this film. Was it difficult working with your ex?” 

_Ex?_

Nico’s ears perked up, the rest of her musings grinding to an abrupt halt. 

_Who the hell is Julie Powers?_

Karolina, on the other hand, seemed entirely unfazed. “Julie and I are professionals,” she explained with her scarily unwavering smile, “we would never let our history get in the way of someone’s vision. I think what many people tend to forget is that we as actors may be the face of a storyline, but we are only small pieces of a much greater machine that makes all of this possible.” 

“Well, yes, I can understand that,” the reporter said impatiently, “but surely you are aware of the rumours that the woman in the famous photograph is Miss Powers? Can you comment on that? Could it be that this encounter has reignited the spark?”

Karolina gave the reporter a polite chuckle. It was almost enough to conceal the fatigue in her eyes. “As far as I’m aware, she is in a very happily committed relationship. I don’t believe that would make her partner very happy.”

“And what about you? Would it make you happy? As happy as your expression in that photo, perchance?”

The other reporter, who had been quietly listening, stopped writing in his notepad and gave the other a disapproving look. The persistent one, however, kept his eyes trained on Karolina, leaning forward as if anticipating the greatest scoop of the century. 

Karolina bit the inside of her cheek, then slowly replaced her smile with one that seemed to chill the room. “I would be happy if I received an invitation to their wedding someday, if that is what you mean.” 

Unfortunately, this reporter must have been the most stubborn, most oblivious man on Earth. He pushed on, as pleased with himself as ever. 

“Oh, of course. The world may be willfully ignorant, but I assure you the physical differences between the woman in the photo and Miss Powers are not lost on us. With that said, surely you can understand the implications of that, Miss Dean? That there is a new person in your life, one the world may have never met?” 

“What is your question?” Karolina replied coolly. 

The man grinned. “Straight to the point as ever. I can appreciate that,” he said, pointing his pen at her. “Then, let me be frank. We all want to know, Miss Dean, who is the thief who stole your heart?”

The disapproving reporter had opened his mouth to finally intervene, but his interest was piqued, as was Nico’s in spite of the panic flooding into her chest. 

Karolina flinched, though her painfully polite smile miraculously remained intact despite the white of her knuckles showing as she gripped her armrest. “That remains to be seen, I suppose.”

The reporter scoffed, more visibly than audibly, and dropped his voice to a whisper, “Interesting.” Not so subtly, he turned to his quiet companion: “A costar?” Then, back to Karolina: “We’d really like to get your statement on this photo before someone on the Internet callously blows this story open. We are on your side, Miss Dean. Surely, you can give us a little more?”

This time, Karolina visibly bristled at the reporter’s dogged pursuit of the topic. Her plastic smile, teetering toward manic, widened to make up for it. The armrest seemed ready to splinter into a million pieces. 

Impressively, she took a deep breath. The awkward tension hung, and it seemed like an eternity when her hands finally relaxed and she cleared her throat, but as if by magic, the warmth in her expression returned. “How about,” she said slowly, “if and when this becomes a tangible topic we can discuss, I’ll give you two a call.” 

The reporter was about to fire off yet another question, but the quiet man pulled him back by the shoulder. “Thank you, Ms. Dean. I think we have everything,” he said with a polite, sympathetic smile. “And you can rest assured that we will only publish what you deem fit. These last few questions—strictly off-record.” The stubborn reporter gave him a scandalized look, but he ignored him. “I hope you will forgive us for our lack of tact. You are an inspiration to many, and we are simply rooting for you, my dear.”

“You’re very kind.”

Soon, the older woman looked up from her phone and ushered the two reporters out of the room with more smiles and platitudes to hurry them along. 

With the room finally empty, Karolina leaned back in her chair and expelled a heavy, heavy sigh. 

“Please tell me it’s over,” Karolina said to the chandelier. 

“That’s the last of them,” Chase responded. 

Karolina’s threw her hand over her eyes and slowly massage her eyelids. “Good,” she mumbled tiredly, “I’m sick of talking about the photo. Sick of talking about Julie or whatever crazy theories people have and _sick_ of pretending that photo doesn’t break my goddamn heart. Why can’t they just focus on my goddamn movie?”

Footsteps tentatively approached her, but Karolina only sank deeper into her velvet chair. 

“The world wants to know if the woman in the photograph makes you happy,” Nico said quietly, pulling her cap off to clutch in her nervous hands. “I…I can’t say I’m not curious myself.” 

Karolina’s lowered her hand, her eyes wide as her gaze flew up to meet Nico’s in utter disbelief. A beat passed, her lips moved soundlessly. She bolted out of her seat, her hands opening and closing in front of her as if she wanted to reach out, but didn’t know how. “Nico?” She said finally. “What…what are you doing here? How—how long have you been here?”

“Just for the last interview,” she said with a shy smile. “I’m sorry I didn’t…I, um, wanted to surprise you? I guess? I don’t…I don’t really know, honestly, I just…wanted to see you.” Nico sucked in a deep breath, then released it slowly. “I didn’t like the way things ended.”

Karolina’s eyes dropped to the marble floor as she clutched her elbow. “Me neither,” she confessed quietly. 

“Your letter made me angry, you know,” Nico said, adding a chuckle at the end to lighten her tone. She couldn’t help but cringe at how hollow it sounded. 

“Sorry…” Karolina replied. “I guess I didn’t really know what else to do.”

“It was so distant. And that’s not even the worst part. You know what the worst part is?”

Karolina shook her head, still unable to meet Nico’s eyes. It was only when Nico reached for her hand and tentatively brushed her fingers with her own that she finally found the courage to. 

One side of Nico’s lips lifted in a grin. “You assumed I wouldn’t forgive you.” 

“Nico, I… what I said was terrible. All of it. I panicked, but that’s not an excuse. You were never a mistake—I’ve always known the risks, and it was my fault I didn’t warn you. I just…wanted so badly for you to like me. For me.”

Chase suddenly burst into the room—neither had heard him leave, and the sudden noise surprised them both. 

“We gotta get going. The press is gonna get antsy if they notice us hanging around. Rest of the cast is heading out. Mrs. Dean left five minutes ago.” 

“She left? Without saying anything?” Karolina asked, brows furrowing slightly. 

Chase threw a sympathetic look her way, and nodded without a word. 

Karolina bit her lip and glanced over at Nico. “Okay, well, um…I guess we should go?” 

When she moved to follow Chase out, however, she felt a slight tug at her wrist. “Can you take me home?” Nico whispered. “We can finish this conversation there…if that’s okay with you.” 

Karolina took her hand with a tentative smile. “Yeah,” she said softly, “I’d like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, it’s good to be back after a few busy weeks. Just a couple quick notes today.
> 
> Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes was a story I read in elementary school. It was pretty popular hear from what I could remember, but when I went to double-check my facts, I learned that it’s a Canadian-American story AND I learned that the name is shared by the ghost in The Ring. Just to clarify for everyone, Gert is not calling Nico a ghost hahaha
> 
> If you haven’t already, please also check out my new one-shot. It’s a story about talking to kids about systematic racism, and understanding the importance of intersexuality. Everyone matters. To phrase it differently, the Karolinas of the world should never matter more than the Nicos. 
> 
> It’s called A Safe Place to Land, and I think it’s one of the most important stories I’ve ever written. Though I’ve set the story in the She-Ra fandom, I hope you’ll support me and find value in the story all the same.
> 
> It’s been a few wild weeks and I hope everyone is happy and safe wherever you are :)


	5. Chapter 5

It was a long, silent drive back to the bookstore. Chase took numerous detours, looping around quiet neighbourhoods to duck back into busy intersections, just in case there were paparazzi lurking nearby. Nico didn’t mind the tinted windows. They added a deeper level of darkness as they drove through the night. Catching Karolina’s shy glances in the reflection didn’t hurt either. It was almost intimate… if not for the panic rising in her throat as they drew closer and closer.

She still hadn’t figured out what she wanted to say. Or what she wanted. Period. Not when so much seemed to be at stake—the life she’d work so hard to build for herself, Karolina’s career. Everything would change if she so much as admitted to _herself_ how much she wanted this woman. But here they were, far beyond that fear in a place neither could return from. And the whole world was waiting.

The only thing she knew for sure was that she didn’t want to give up yet. There was a pull between them she’d never experienced before—unseen forces that seemed to grow stronger even when they were apart.

There was no rhyme or reason to them, and yet they were like two notes of a burgeoning melody, two colours blending together, two clinks of a chisel against marble. There seemed to be an inexplicable trust that they would be a masterpiece, yet the fear of lifting that instrument, that brush, that chisel seemed too much.

“Alright, ladies.” Nico looked around, and saw that they’d arrived. Her heart hammered. “It’s too conspicuous to leave the car out here,” he continued, oblivious to her nerves, “I’ll be dropping by Gert’s to surprise her. If she kicks me out, then I’ll head home.” He flashed them a boyish grin. “But I’m sure she won’t. So just call when you’re ready to head home. Don’t forget you have a press conference tomorrow, Karolina. So I’ll be here at eight o’clock sharp tomorrow morning if I don’t hear from you.”

Nico blushed at the implication, and saw that Karolina nodded, distracted. She fidgeted with her shining cuff link, unable to meet anyone’s eye as she followed Nico inside.

The store was awash in muted moonlight through the blinds like a silver cage. They moved silently through the dark, past the books, the magic in the pages, the skull and the cranes, and up the stairs. All the while, Nico felt Karolina’s eyes against her back and wondered, not for the first time, what she saw. Her fears or her hopes? She didn’t know which scared her more.

She unlocked the door. This is dangerous, her mind suddenly screamed. Karolina was so close, and they were so alone—what were they thinking?

No, no, they were just going to talk, Nico reminded herself. Talking about what? Them? Her hands shook as she closed the door behind Karolina, finding herself suddenly close enough to catch a whiff of her hair. The simple action brought her back to the night on the bench, in their own private garden, lost in each other’s everything.

She quickly took a deep back. “Coffee?” She asked, sucking in a breath.

“No, maybe just some water if that’s alright?”

“Yeah. Sure. I mean—of course.” She scurried into her modest kitchen, a corner of the apartment tucked away and seldom used. She rested her forehead on the fridge for a moment as she frantically tried to process the entire night. A month ago, all she wanted was her peace, a life of quiet obscurity, bobbing along like so many did. Karolina wasn’t a part of the plan. And these feelings—they _definitely_ weren’t part of the plan.

She wasn’t stupid—she knew what she was feeling, but the sheer intensity of it! How was she supposed to factor _that_ into this conversation? She heaved a sigh and finally pulled two bottles of water from her mostly empty fridge.

When she returned to the living room, Karolina was on the love seat, thumbing through the pages of a book on the coffee table.

“I don’t think I ever pegged you down for a poetry kind of girl.”

Nico handed her a bottle of water, awkwardly reaching over the coffee table as she eyed the small couch in her living room. They wouldn’t be able to sit together without touching. She stood in front of the coffee table instead, finding distraction in the book Karolina held. “Everything is poetry when you think about it,” she said with a shrug. “Magic, music, life—it’s easier to understand in poems, I think. At the core of it, everything we feel—it’s…universal. So why complicated it with unnecessary words? I mean, it’s kind of the purest form of human expression when you think about it.”

Karolina’s brows shot up. “Wow,” she said, “you just keep surprising me, Nico. I had no idea you had such a—I’m looking for the right word here—an artist’s soul, I guess?”

Nico scoffed. “I just spend a lot of time with books. You’re the artist, if anything.”

Karolina laughed. “I’m an actor. That hardly counts.”

“You could be a musician,” Nico shrugged. “Aren’t celebrities all multi-talented and stuff?”

“Not this one,” Karolina replied, pointing at herself with her bottle of water. “Absolutely tone deaf.”

“Ah.” Finally, Nico approached the love seat and leaned her weight against the armrest. “Guess we can’t all be perfect,” she said.

“Far from it,” Karolina agreed. There was something in the timbre of her voice then, something unsaid that slipped through into the silence that made Nico’s heart beat a little faster. They held their breaths, their eyes finding every square inch of space but each other’s. “Listen, Nico…” she said slowly, wincing slightly at the shakiness of her words, “I really messed up, and I’m sorry.”

Nico looked down at the bottle of water in her hands, and picked lightly at the label. “I…don’t really know what to say.”

Suddenly, she felt Karolina’s hand on her forearm like a wisp, like she didn’t know who was more fragile. “I really, really like you, Nico. You know that right? I know our circumstances are…different, and maybe it’s not exactly ideal, but the short time I spent with you was the happiest I’ve been in a very long time. You don’t have to forgive me—god knows the media didn’t help—I just…I guess I want you to know. You—we—could never be a mistake.”

“Karolina, I…” Nico stopped and covered her eyes with one hand. “I don’t know what to do. The last few weeks has been so…hard and so confusing. I-I used to know what I _want_.” She dropped her hand heavily into her lap, and slowly, tentatively, allowed herself to find Karolina’s eyes. “I used to know what my life was going to be like. I had all these plans, goals. They were mundane, but dammit they were mine. And then _you_ came in and tore down my walls and took my couch and dripped all over my floors, and—and…then you were gone.”

“Nico…”

Karolina scooted a little closer on the couch and wordlessly laced their fingers together.

“Then the sweater came, and that note, and I was _so mad_ at you before I knew why.” Nico paused to squeeze her hand, shutting her eyes as if that could stop the rest of her emotions from bubbling up like a fountain. “And now I know why, and I don’t know if I should say it out loud because nothing is going to be the same if I do.”

“Nico,” Karolina repeated in a whisper. She pulled her in from the armrest and onto her lap, where she caught her in a tight embrace. Nico stiffened, but lulled by her scent, she melted into her in surrender. She felt fingers gently massaging her scalp and a heartbeat against her chest, racing as fast as her own. She felt a warm breath against her ear. “You don’t have to say it. Not if you don’t want to.”

“Things…are changing, Karolina,” Nico said after a long pause. She curled up against her chest, warmer and more comfortable than she could ever remember feeling. “And it’s like I’m trying to stop a tidal wave with my bare hands.”

She felt the slight movement of Karolina’s swallow. “But change can be a good thing, right?”

“Hell if I know,” Nico scoffed. “I folded three-hundred-seventy-four cranes last week. I felt like I was losing my mind—like I was possessed by my grandmother or something. She told me when I was little that if you fold a thousand cranes, your wish will come true, so…I just kept going. Didn’t really know why. Don’t even know what I’d wish for, but I just kept thinking about you and I just kept going. Like if I reached a thousand, I’d get some kind of clarity.”

Karolina hummed. “Well,” she said slowly, “I knit myself a sweater.”

“And two scarves, according to Gert,” Nico chuckled.

“How did she—ugh, Chase and his big mouth. Anyway…” she trailed off for a moment, followed by another swallow, “Did she also tell you that the sweater is navy? I couldn’t find the exact shade, but…it’s pretty close.”

Nico peeled away and straightened up to meet her eyes. “Why?” She asked.

“I…thought I’d closed the door on us,” she explained with her gaze focused on Nico’s hand on the armrest. “I needed to give the sweater back, but it felt so…important, and I didn’t want it to be over just like that. I made a mistake, and I…just wanted to do the right thing.”

She waited, but Nico said nothing.

“You know,” she continued, “everyone thinks I’m this perfect, untouchable thing, but I’m so far from that sometimes that it kills me. I’m…I’m just a girl wanting to ask a girl to love her. I want to ask it so badly—more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life, and it scares me. It’s like…the words are right there but what if they get stuck in my throat, and all of it comes out wrong. I’m just…scared, Nico.”

And still Nico said nothing. Instinct pulled her closer, begged her to say the words and kiss her until she couldn’t remember her own name. Reason begged her to pull away, to remember the shape of reality. It wasn’t until the silence felt like four walls closing in that she finally spoke.

“I can’t,” she said.

Then the silence felt like nothing at all.

Nico stood, both hands pressed against her eyes, unable to bear looking at Karolina. Her heart had sunken when the words came out of her lips, but the water seemed to rise to her ears and she felt herself drowning.

Karolina rose too. “I know,” she said softly. Sadly. “I didn’t expect you to give up your world for me, Nico.”

This wasn’t how Nico expected the night to go. Tonight had been fueled by memories of Karolina’s touch, her soft mouth, and the safety of her loving gaze, and here she was, telling her to love her, promising all of those things and more in the sincerity of her words. But here _she_ was, pushing her away.

“You should go,” Nico heard herself say. No, stay, her heart pleaded, horrified.

“Yeah,” Karolina sniffled, looking away to wipe her eyes delicately with the back of her hand.

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, Nico wanted to scream. Stay. But the words wouldn’t come out. She couldn’t stop picturing the flashing lights, strangers hounding and cataloguing her every move. And her freedom slipping away so soon, just to dive into a life scripted to please the world.

Another life revolved around another.

By the time she looked up, Karolina was at the door, tapping out a message on her phone. She let out a shaky breath.

Her low, whispery voice broke her heart.

“I’ll…I’ll see you around, Nico.”

* * *

The vast emptiness that followed Karolina leaving was not the kind of peace she wanted. It was loud and annoying, and in her face. It seemed to sit on her shoulder, whispering over and over that it was her fault it was here. That she chose this. That she better enjoy it because she _chose_ this.

Nico stayed on the love seat with her head in her hands.

The night wore on, moonlight spilling into her living room.

Dawn crept in, sunlight barely penetrating her conscience.

This was her peace. Her safe place. This was the choice she made.

And yet…

She rubbed her eyes, grabbed her keys, and sulked her way down the street to the coffee shop nearby.

It was barely six o’clock, but a few early risers were already in line. Nico shuffled her feet forward to stand behind a woman in an impeccably ironed suit, who was speaking on the phone in a low voice. Nico stared at her shoes, still wondering if she’d made the worst mistake of her life when the universe suddenly seemed to throw her a sign: the woman in front turned around and looked her up and down, her brow raised, quietly assessing as she held her phone to the ear.

Nico, however, didn’t see it as a sign at first. She furrowed her brows and took a step back, wholly uncomfortable at the sudden scrutiny.

Then, the universe’s message got a little louder.

“Just run the questions by Rochelle so she can step in. We are _not_ missing the press conference,” the woman said emphatically. She gave Nico one last glance, before turning to the barista with her order.

Nico blinked. That was odd, she thought. But as she waited for the woman to finish her exceedingly complex coffee order, two words marinated in her brain.

Press conference.

Nico straightened up when the universe’s message finally struck her like a stubborn bolt of lightning.

The press conference!

She fumbled for her phone, mumbling her apologies when she suddenly whipped around and stumbled into startled customers. She fled the familiar warmth of her favourite café, and she ignored the eyes, ignored the aggravated words thrown her way—they sounded like cold, white static as she threw herself out onto the open street. 

With her heart beating wildly in her chest, she scrolled through her messages and found Chase’s number. She began to type out a message, but quickly shook her head. It was too much to articulate, and he’d never see it in time—she’d call him instead.

Above her, the sun was coming out. It was going to be a beautiful morning.

Except Chase didn’t pick up.

She checked the time—6:11 AM. The press conference wasn’t until nine.

She had time, she told herself, taking a deep breath. She just needed to figure out where to go. She just needed to…

Her feet were moving before she could finish her thought. It was a beautiful morning. Beautiful enough for a run. Nico’s wild heart didn’t give her time to hesitate, and she ran as if her life depended on it.

In that very moment, it seemed like it did.

She arrived at the familiar apartment complex with one hand across her stomach, breathing raggedly as the other jabbed at the intercom with sweaty fingers. “Pick up, pick up, pick up,” she pleaded under her breath.

She buzzed the apartment. Again and again and again, until…

“For fuck’s sake, who is it?” Gert’s voice roared through the static.

“Gert!” Nico cried, practically hugging the intercom with joy. “It’s Nico. Let me in. Please, let me in.”

Gert hung up and the buzzer sounded.

6:53 AM.

Gert’s door swung open, and Nico, half-expecting to be jabbed through the heart with a glare, unexpectedly found herself engulfed with wide-eyed concerned. “Nico—what are you—are you okay? Did you _run_ here?”

“I’m fine,” she replied quickly, closing the door behind her just to fidget restlessly at the doorway. “I need to find Karolina. Do you know where the press conference is?”

“You were with her last night,” Gert said, pouring a glass of water from the kitchenette next to the front door. “What happened? Chase was here for like twenty minutes before he rushed out again.”

Nico swallowed. “I think…I freaked out and made a really, really big mistake.”

Gert gave her a look. “Nico.”

“D-Don’t look at me like that. It’s not that easy. I mean, maybe it is and I’m just complicating things. But, c’mon Gert, obviously we’re from two different worlds,” Nico went on, cringing. “It’s an old cliché that doesn’t work, because…because I don’t know!”

“Nico—”

She wasn’t listening. Nico threw her hands up, pacing the small space of the entryway with a kind of frazzled, exhaustion-induced fire in her eyes. “Maybe it can work, but can you blame me for freaking out? This is going to change my life forever—everything I thought I ever wanted. People—strangers—they’ll know who I am and they’ll _talk_ and…and a month ago all I worried about was bad book sales!” Her voice had climbed, louder and louder, escalating into a loud, frustrated grunt into both palms. Gert nudged the glass of water that had been sitting untouched on the kitchen counter for the last few minutes. Nico sank down to a squat, letting out another pained groan into her palms. She took a deep breath, and when she was ready to speak again, her voice was soft. “And now all I worry about is Karolina. And me. I don’t…want to lose her, Gert, but I’m so…scared. And she’s…I don’t know—she’s going to get hurt. I’m going to get hurt...”

Gert raised a brow. “But?”

Nico bit her lip. “But…there’s something about her that makes me want to be more than I am.”

Finally, Gert smiled. “So?”

“So help me, Gert,” Nico pleaded. “Help me get her back.”

* * *

8:47 AM.

Nico tapped her finger on her thigh. Her patience had worn out about an hour ago, and it was all she could do not to punch something. Or someone. Maybe the man in the car beside them with his windows down and his music pouring out so loudly that everyone within a block radius must’ve been able to hear it. What kind of asshole _chooses_ to blast “Barbie Girl,” Nico thought through gritted teeth.

The bigger problem, of course, was that they hadn’t moved an inch in about fifteen minutes.

“Nico, calm down,” Gert said from beside her. “You look like you’re going to kill somebody.”

Nico looked at the clock on the driver’s dashboard for what must’ve been the fiftieth time in the last few minutes. She tried to swallowed her emotions, her voice cracking when she said, “We’re not going to make it, Gert.”

Gert reached over and placed a hand on her knee. “We’ll make it,” she said firmly. “I’ve already texted Chase. He’ll get us in. We just have to get there.”

“But it starts at nine—at this rate we’ll never make it before it’s over.” Nico glared out the window at Mr. Barbie Girl, but it did nothing to alleviate the building knots of anxiety inside.

Gert glanced at her watch. “No, we can make it.”

“How?”

“If we run. Now.”

“Are you—are you serious?”

“What? Afraid, you can’t keep up?” She opened the door and stepped onto the congested highway, tossing a smirk over her shoulder. “We’re getting your girl, Nico, so stop gawking and move your skinny ass!”

9:05 AM.

Traffic horns. Everywhere.

Nico’s heart hammered with excitement and exertion.

She’d never once imagined she’d be running through traffic and sliding over strangers’ hoods like she was in an action movie. A shitty one, but she’d be an action hero nonetheless. Kind of like Karolina in the _Helix 2_ trailer she saw. She couldn’t help but smile at the thought—the normal girl chasing the love of her life, no matter what it took.

Wait, love of her—

“Ow, fuck!” Nico cursed when her knee somehow managed to collide with someone’s bumper. “For fuck’s sake, universe,” Nico grumbled under her breath as she held her knee and tried to catch her breath. “I get it, okay? I fucking love her. Can you be a _little_ less in-your-face about it?”

“Nico!” Nico snapped her head up to see Gert waving at her from the end of this street. “Keep moving! Let’s go, let’s go!”

When did Gert get so _fast_?

At 9:31 AM, Chase met them at the front lobby of a nondescript office building with two bottles of water (one of which Nico downed so fast that her friends could only watch, slightly bug-eyed as they hoped she didn’t drown herself). Chase had instructions, another security jacket prepared and matching—a plan. But the interviews were winding down, and they had to act _fast_ , and that was all Nico heard before shoving past Chase and walking straight into the middle of the press conference.

And she was _not_ prepared for the sheer volume of noise.

She was also not prepared for the warmth that flooded her as soon as she saw beautiful, sweet Karolina seated at the middle of a long table alongside her co-stars, with her practiced smile and natural charm the reporters ate up with a spoon. Nor was she prepared for the worry that quickly followed when nobody else seemed to noticed the poorly-concealed circles around her eyes.

Nico hid in the crowd of reporters, trying her best not to let her anxieties sweep her out into the ocean.

“What’s next for Miss Karolina Dean?” A reporters yelled above the sound of a hundred other voices.

Karolina let out a breath. “I will be taking a small hiatus. I will be releasing an official statement in a few weeks.”

An eruption of confused murmurs and turning heads.

“Does this have to do with the rumours that the woman in the photograph has left you?”

The frustration teeming off Karolina was palpable to Nico from across the room, but the reporters pushed forward, their chairs long pushed aside. The security team pushed back to little avail. They all wanted to know, and wouldn’t stop until they did.

A strawberry-blonde woman several places down the long table, an actress Nico did not recognize perhaps, leaned into the microphone. “This press conference was set up to promote the movie. Let’s stick to that,” she said, not bothering to hide her annoyance.

“Ms. Powers, many of our readers are adamant that you are the subject of the photograph. Can you confirm?” Someone shouted from the crowd.

Nico elbowed forward a few steps to get a better look at the woman scowling at the crowd. So this was Julie Powers. Karolina’s ex. Nico swallowed. She was beautiful, of course. In the same way, perhaps, that many found Karolina beautiful—unbeknownst, of course, to the many layers of profound beauty laying beneath.

“For the last time,” Julie said, “Karolina and I are almost the same height. Take a better look at that damn photograph before you start throwing around accusations. And more importantly,” she held up her left hand, where a diamond ring sparkled on her fourth finger, “I’m _engaged_!”

More questions followed in rapid-fire, until finally, Karolina slammed both hands down on the table. The room fell silent as she pulled the microphone closer toward her.

“Everyone,” she said firmly, “I will give an official statement regarding the photograph. There will be no follow-up questions. We will then move on, so we can all go home. Does that work for everyone?”

The room murmured, and the man beside her mouthed “thank god.”

“Good,” Karolina said. “The subject of the photograph is not Julie Powers. As Ms. Powers stated, the physical description of the subject does not match. More than that, Ms. Powers and I are strictly friends and that will not change. I wholeheartedly wish her and her fiancée all the happiness in the world. As for the subject of the photograph—all I’ll ask is to please respect her privacy. The only thing your readers and viewers need to know is that she is…” Karolina swallowed the tears that came unexpectedly, then glanced up at the ceiling as she took a deep breath. “She is no longer a part of my life.”

The reporters scribbled furiously, but no one seemed to know what to say by the end. Karolina’s cast mates looked at one another.

Then, Karolina fell back in her chair, defeated.

Her expression broke Nico’s heart.

Nico clenched her fists and dug deep for the courage she never thought she possessed. No more hesitating. No more excuses. Forget all the wolves that surrounded her in this tightly packed room. All she could think about was picking up the pieces of the heart that she’d broken.

She pushed her way to the very front of the crowd, pushed back against the security guards’ outstretched arms.

“Ms. Dean, my readers would like to know what you’d like to say to the subject of the photograph if she were here right now.”

Karolina raised her eyes slowly.

“There will be no follow-up questions!” One of the guards roared.

Nico ignored him and pushed on. “If the subject of the photograph came to her senses and realized what an idiot she was for allowing you to leave her life—what would you say?”

The room was quiet, and all eyes were on the strange woman at the centre of the room without a press badge, a notebook, or recorder. The only woman with a defiant spark in her eyes.

Everyone waited with bated breaths.

“I…” Karolina said, her hands trembling slightly as she grasped the microphone, “I’d tell her that I think I’m in love with her. Even if we’re from two different worlds.”

Quiet gasps sporadically bubbled throughout the crowd.

Nico grinned. “Good,” she said, “because she’s in love with you too.”

Finally, Nico shoved past the two guards and strode over to the table. Hundreds of eyes watched her reach across the table, watched as Karolina rose from her seat to meet her halfway, and watched—in awe—as the mysterious woman, soon to be world famous for stealing Karolina Dean’s heart right in front of the cameras, laid a hand to her cheek and pulled her in for a searing kiss.

Nico wouldn’t hear the voices around them until later, and she wouldn’t question the reckless decision to dive headfirst into public scrutiny until much, _much_ later. By then, they would face it together. More importantly, she would be too lost in Karolina’s arms to care.

Right now, what they had in front of them was a promise. Karolina pulled away, breathless, pink-faced, and for one long second, paralyzed with disbelief. Then, she smiled all the way to her watery eyes—that same smile that sparked the world’s attention.

It was all the invitation Nico needed to take Karolina’s hand and merge their two orbiting worlds into a world of their own

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Thanks for coming on this journey with me. This was not a long journey, but one I had in the works for some time and a more lighthearted treat perhaps after my last story. 
> 
> I’ll be taking a break from writing fic for a while, so no promises on that epilogue, unfortunately. By the time I finish, deanoru may even be long forgotten, but I hope you’ll subscribe just in case. 
> 
> This fandom was a lot of fun and I’ll miss it dearly :’) Wishing you all the best—stay safe and stay healthy. See you all again someday.


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